A类5.5分C8T1 大作文范文

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1.作文题目

Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. You should give reasons for your answer using your own ideas and experience. Write at least 250 words.

2.学生原文

Nowadays, some people believe the parents are the best tutor for their children to let them know how to obey the roles and be a good person. Others think it is schools’ job to train the young people to be a good member of society.

Parents have responsibility to teach their children to be a good member of society. The younger generation spends most of their tune staying at home before they enter the primary school. During this period, it is the best chance for children to raise a positive outlook of life. Parents are the first person that makes them knows how to be nice to others and be honest no matter what kind of job they do or the course they learn. Also, for the young children, parents are the most reliable adults upon this world. As a result, they will probably be easier to accept the advice from their mother and father and without suspect.

There are, however, many and various skills that cannot be taught by parents. The only way for children to learn the social skills which are the most important abilities for the future study and working lives are by staying at school and work with their peers. For example, the only way to learn the sense of cooperation is by studying with other classmates. Furthermore, if the children stay at home and learn from their parents, they will hardly learn how to be a leader and finish works with their partners. School can also train the children to be self-control both on focus on their study and finish their work on time, which pupils cannot learn from their parents.

In conclusion, I think letting children to be a good member of society cannot be schools’ of parents’ job only. The parents should teach their children to know the basic roles and the schools have to finish the rest works.

3.老师批改

Nowadays, some people believe thatthe parents are the best tutor for their children to let them know how to obey the roles and be a good personteaching their children how to obey the rules and be a good adult.(首先这句话里their有歧义，既可以指parents也可以指children，而一句话里一个代词只能指代一个对象。Let太口语化。) Others, on the contrary,think it is schools’ job to train the young people to be a good member of society.第一段最后一句话最好还应加上作者的观点或者全篇文章的布局

Parents have responsibility to teach their children to be a good member of society.(第一句话为主题句，不是单纯重复主要观点) The main reason why moral education is the responsibility of parents is concerned with the intimacy between parents and children. The younger generation spendsmost of their tune the majority of their timestaying at home before they entering the primary school. During this period, it is the best chance for children to raisehave(没有raise outlook这种说法) a positive outlook of life. Parents are the first person that makes them（这个代词在这句话里指代的是parents，可是意思上作者应该表达的是孩子）knows how to be nice to others and be honest no matter what kind of job they do or the course they learn.（划横线句子改为：This indicates that parents are the first person who guide the immature children to behave properly regardless of what academic courses these pupils are going to learn in the future.）Also, for the young children, parents are the most reliable adults uponinthis world. As a result, they will probably be easier to accept the advice from their mother and father and without suspect.

There are, however, many and(多余 啰嗦) various skills that cannot be taught by parents. The only

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way for children to learn the social skills which are the most important abilities for the future study and working lives are by staying（主语可是way） is to stayat school andwhere they are provided with many opportunities towork with their peers. For example, the only way tostudents can learn the sense of cooperation is by studying with other classmates. Furthermore, if the children stay at home and learn from their parents, they will hardly learn how to be a leader and finish works(works指作品) with their partners. Schools （单数可数名词不能单独出现）can also train the children to be self-controlled （这样才是一个形容词）both on focus on their study and finish their work on time,（both on focus on…是什么意思？而且这句话有了两个谓语train和focus，句子结构不完整） which pupils cannot learn from their parents.（改：In addition to teamwork spirit, children can also learn self-control because they have to finish their tasks prior to playing in the ground and this is difficult to be gained at home where parents sometimes tend to spoil their children.）

In conclusion, I think letting children to be a good member of society cannot be schools’ of parents’ job onlyNeither the school nor parents should be responsible for children’s behaviors exclusively. Rather, they are better to cooperate with each other. TheParents should teach their children to know the basic roles and the schools have toshould finish the rest works.

4.作文总评

作文分数：5.5分

红色部分都是添加的内容。 黄色标出的是语法错误的解释。 绿色是对文章结构问题的分析。

雅思大作文评分标准一共四个：

1内容（比较充分的回答了题目的问题，观点清晰）;

2逻辑和连贯性（段落内部有些地方连接词比较生硬或者缺少连接词，但总的来说做的还不错）；

3词汇运用（这个问题比较严重，具体你可以看改动部分）；

4语法句型（除了少部分句型结构有问题，基本不影响读懂文章意思。但有些句子写的不够好，偏口语化，具体看改动部分）

5.作文范文：

Whether parents are our best teachers or not’ is a never-ending debate and people are divided both in favour and against this argument. Both have a very strong contribution and influence on a child’s learning but in my opinion, parents overtake the teachers in terms of teaching their children.

First of all, I would like to point out that a teacher is not merely a person who takes a text book and read texts from there to a student. Rather a teacher is someone who devotes his/her times to teach someone everything that someone needs to know to advance to next step. Morality, intricacies of life, subject matter knowledge, art, science, history, value of time etc. are something that can’t be taught through academic books and a good teacher is someone who teaches someone these all.

Now that we know the true responsibility of a teacher, we can easily compare our parents and teachers. The things that we learn from our parents are far more important than what we learn from our teachers.

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I am not denying the invaluable knowledge we learn from our teachers through our academic years, but what we learn from our parents are incomparable. We learn to survive, talk, and distinguish well from bad, values of life, morality and such important other things from our parents. We are the true reflection of our parents and our characters are shaped by their personality and behaviours. Later the teachers help us to enhance our knowledge, horizon and our view of life but the very foundation and ground are made by our parents.

The parents sacrifice so many things of their life just to ensure a better life for us and nothing in this whole world could even be compared with their sacrifice for us. Think of a student who is unable to pay his/her monthly school fees would be cast away from the school and the beloved teachers would scarcely be there to help him/her. On the other hand, the parents would always be there with their every possible effort to help the child.

In summary, the things we learn from our teachers are important for our lives and with those valuable lessons and knowledge we prepare for the future but the things we learn from our parents shapes who we are, who we become and their contribution is much more important compared to the contribution of the traditional academic teachers and that’s why in my opinion parents are best teachers.

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