PS到底怎么写

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总结高人的PS经验

PS 到底怎么写 - structure

Hi Everyone,

I am a graduate student at Harvard University and I work at MIT's admissions office. I also offer writing and editing service. Through my professional experience, I have come across some very common mistakes in PSs. However, reading the blogs and suggestion columns, I find very little information that is truly useful. The advice just seems conventional and vague. So, I decided to start a series of informational posts to help you guys. I will address one main topic everyday. Hopefully these blogs will help you.

What should I focus on in my PS?

Your PS should include 5 essential elements:

1) Your motivation- What has inspired you to pursue the field? This could include background, research

experiences, family influence, etc.

2) Professional/research background- Lots of people have problems in this area and don't know what to focus on. I obviously cannot just make a list of all possible fields. However, as a good rule of thumb: If

your future goal is to work in industry – focus on professional experience. If your goal is to work in

research or academia - focus on research experience.

Explaining Research Experience: Do not just say “new “developments. Thinking about the

following questions will help you more comprehensively describe your research.

1) How did your research change or impact the field - what was the situation before or after your

contribution? Emphasize the significance.

If you only assisted research - how was your assistance important? What did you actually do?

How did you contribute to the overall project? Although you only assisted in research, you still

need to make sure that you explain the big picture of the research project and purpose. What was

the goal of the research?

2) What problems did you solve and how

3) What was your research process? In this area, include technologies, approaches, systems used

(example: Choice behavior, regression analysis, due diligence, game theory. Please note that

“mathematical model is too vague.)..Do not forget to say HOW you used the above and why.

4) Results - leadership, achievements, publications, patents, proceedings, etc

5) Future work - in this area...you can include information about possible research for your future.

For professional experience - focus on contributions to the company and your job tasks. Also

make sure you list your achievements, promotions, leadership, etc

3) Future goals and how you will achieve them. (Sometimes it is a good idea to split this into short and

long term goals). Be specific in terms of how... This should be easy since you should already have a

plan for your life. This can include your graduate studies, future jobs, etc

4) Why did you pick the school, and how you will contribute to it?

To answer this question, make sure you know the school. It is a good idea to use specific courses or

programs offered by the school to emphasize your points. Student organizations and research focus can

总结高人的PS经验

also be included. DO NOT say things like "the school's excellent reputation and faculty impresses me" - this is vague and useless. Anyone on the admissions committee reading it will know right away that you have no idea what you are talking about. However...you can talk about the placement program, an specific professor's research, specific labs, etc.

In terms of your contribution...sometimes it might help to think about the future global situation. For

example, as Asia develops, your cultural background and information on Asian society will become

very useful. I'm sure this would be very helpful to your classmates.

5) Any other information the school has asked you to provide.

An example for this question is Leadership. When talking about leadership, it is best to use an actual

example. However, if you do not have any leadership experience, you can use situations where you

exhibited leadership qualities - such as determination, compassion, drive, communication, sacrifice,

organization. Just make sure you are able to explain how these traits make you a good leader.

However, the most important pieces of advice I can give you are: 1) Make sure you come up with a comprehensive outline before you write. ORGANIZE your thoughts

2) Choose examples from your past VERY VERY carefully. DO NOT choose examples that include

failure. This will only highlight your negatives. DO NOT include examples where you are presenting

another company, organization, person, situation in a negative light. This will make you seem like you

are complaining and difficult to work with. When speaking about another organization...be either

positive or neutral. DO NOT speak negatively about your previous company.

If you have any specific questions...feel free to email me at tinaxue@mit.edu or

tinaxue@fas.harvard.edu. While I do charge for actual writing and editing, I can take a quick look at

your drafts and give you immediate feedback on the most obvious issues I see.

PS 到底怎么写 2 - tone

Okay...so hopefully most of you guys read my post on structure "PS 到底怎么写 - structure". Today I

will talk about tone. Tomorrow I will talk about essay length and why it is essential that you stay within a reasonable range of the word limit.

So TONE...

From reading a lot of different PSs and essays, I have found that a lot of you try to be very emphatic and

capture the reader's attention right away. (YES I know this is good...hold on let me finish). A lot of you also try to start with a line that is very..."inspirational" or... a "compelling" statement, such as "My dream is to create change in order to benefit the world through my work".... or "My passion in XXX has shown me the meaning of life"....if this sounds like your PS...PLEASE KEEP READING.

Basically, this is not the correct tone to use!!

WHY? Because this tone makes you seem pretentious and fake. It is almost as if you are trying too hard because you are trying to make up for your shortcomings and that you are really not good enough.

What should I do?

Mindset

总结高人的PS经验

When you are writing, think about it as an autobiography. You need to let your story shine through without making it seem pretentious, which is exactly what this tone does to any document. YOUR STORY should be good enough. Be down to earth and relax. If you are thinking too hard, the writing comes across as nervous and unsure. Think about how you would speak to someone when you are telling a story about yourself. Use this tone to write. Not only will your writing be clearer, it will show that you have confidence in yourself. Remember, the professors are just people. Yes they are more powerful than us, but they also want to be around relaxed, friendly and sincere people.

How do I capture their attention

I mentioned earlier that some people try to be very emphatic. Starting with an interesting phrase is fine. However, there is a fine-line between shocking someone with your opening statement, and making them feel interested in you. The first line should also be informational. If you just include a random quote....or a compelling statement such as....Economics is the cornerstone of society....you just wasted your first line.

This is actually one of the most difficult things to master in your document. I suggest 1) you come up with multiple possibilities and 2) and ask yourself...how does this line, independently, present me?

A good example of an opening line…

＂Unlike some applicants, I have not always wanted to study economics. However, because I have explored different career alternatives, I am more certain and determined about my future.＂

Why is this good? There are several positive things about this statement.

1) Right away, you are giving information about your past, how you are unique, why you are better than the conventional candidate. 2) The first sentence captures the reader’s attention right away. It makes them wonder...why are you saying this? You haven't wanted to always study economics but you are applying? Why? By presenting a counterintuitive statement, you are presenting the reader with a puzzle, challenging them to solve it．

3) Right away, this candidate also explained how something that might seem outwardly negative is really a positive...BEING ABLE TO DO THIS IS VERY VERY IMPORTANT. EVERY RAIN CLOUD HAS A SILVER LINING....MAKE SURE YOU EMPHASIZE THE SILVER LINING AS THIS OPENING LINE DID.

4) This line shows determination and certainty. Regardless of the applicant's past, the reader is convinced right way that the writer really is sure about wanting to study economics. Certainty is a big bonus for your

application because ad-com members want to make offers to students that will definitely accept.

Where can I use compelling statements..

Generally, after you have presented yourself and your abilities, you can close the essay with a more compelling statement about your future, your goals, your success, etc. The reasons is, by this point, hopefully your

document has convinced the reader that you really have the ability to do something so compelling.

MOST IMPORTANT ********When do I use a thesaurus?

NEVER use a thesaurus during your first draft. NEVER. The reason is, from my experience, a lot of words are used incorrectly when you use a thesaurus because you do not actually know the nuances of the word

unless you look in a dictionary. Even if you look in a dictionary, sometimes the Chinese English dictionaries are not 100% accurate. I've seen people try to use "seduce" in place of "convince"...which is very embarrassing, and at best...will be circulated as a joke around the admissions office. Using the thesaurus also creates the

problem of sounding pretentious because your sentence structure is generally not complex enough to match the words. So there is incongruity in your writing, which just comes across as awkwardness.

总结高人的PS经验

Use the thesaurus after you have pretty much finalized the document. A few "elegant" word-changes add a lot to the document. But do not overuse the thesaurus. Sometimes, changing a word here or there will also allow you to see new possibilities to phrase your sentences better. All I can say is...REVISE REVISE REVISE...each revision you do will make the essay better. Most great essays have been revised multiple times. Even I offer at least 2 rounds of revisions after the finalized version as part of my services.

Anyway, as always, hope this helps. Feel free to contact me at tinaxue@mit.edu with any questions

PS 到底怎么写 3 - length

Okay

as promised...today this blog will be about document length. I need to do a literature review for my supervisor this weekend so I will not have time to blog about anything. However, on Monday, I will talk about why it is bad to write negatively about your past experience/company/school/manager/etc. and how to maintain a neutral tone even if you absolutely have to explain a negative experience.

What about the word limit?

Now most schools will give you a word limit. If they do, you need to abide by this word limit. Yes, some schools are more lenient than others. For example, Harvard allows about 20% overage. However, Stanford allows zero. So unless you are positive about what the school's policy is, then stick as close to the word limit as possible. My own personal inclination is no more than 10%. If you ask my customers, they will tell you that generally I am EXACTLY on the nose with the word limit. The reason I do this is because, (rumors around the office last year was) some schools are now implementing automatic systems. In order to save the ad-com

members from too much work, their online systems will automatically cut off your essay at the word limit so that if it is too long, it will not even show up when printed. I do not know if they can get that precise. However, I have definitely seen file size limits, where you cannot upload the file if it exceeds the limit. If there is no indicated word limit, your PS, unless you are Bill Gates or Bill Clinton, should not exceed 2 pages (roughly around 800 words). Like any reader, unless your writing skills mirror Tolstoy's, the reader will get tired, bored, and impatient if your PS is too long...EVEN if it is still full of relevant material. So, for

PSes...concision is KEY.

WHY is it so important to be concise or stick to the word limit?

1) The PS itself is not just to get to know you; it is a test of your communication skills. It gives the ad-com

members an idea of how well you can communicate, your English skills, etc. As a graduate student, your

need to be able to communicate with them on research, participate in presentations and class discussions,

and sometimes, even act as a liaison with the project partners. They NEED someone that can communicate.

For MBA students...if you do not understand why communication is one of the essential elements of

business...then you should not be applying for an MBA. So therefore...I am not going to explain why MBA ad-com committees value communication skills.

Not being able to abide by the word limit shows that you cannot communicate with concision. Why is it

you cannot, when everyone else can? It shows that you do not know how to pick what to write, how to

pick your focus, etc. In fact...it could even go as far as to show that you do not know what you want to say or how to say it. To be honest, I have yet to see an essay that has been "too-long" that I have not been able to cut down. If your essay is too long, generally, there is too much unnecessary information that is really

not useful in your PS. CUT IT OUT.

总结高人的PS经验

2) The word limit in itself is a direction. They school is telling you to do perform a task. If you cannot do it...it

shows your inability to do so (which implies a flaw or shortcoming), you did not care about their requests (you are a rebel) and that you cannot follow directions (and following directions is essential in performing well as a student and researcher). Okay...so I exaggerate. However, let me tell you...I have never seen a

candidate with a "too-long" PS get accepted How do I cut the length...

1) Check your descriptions - adjectives and adjective phrases. Not all adjective phrases are necessary. For

example, Tsinghua University, the premier technological institute in China "the premier technological institute in China" is unnecessary because it is an obvious statement.

2) Choose your background experiences carefully. In your PS, you do not need to mention every single detail of your past experiences. You should mention the big picture, how the big picture was achieved, and what technology was used. Be clear and concise.

For example: I developed and applied a land use and transportation model using floating car data, collected from XXX, to evaluate the volume of transportation greenhouse gas emissions and propose potential ways to decrease pollution.

Bad example: I collected floating car data in XXX from a system implemented by my university during a previous project started by my adviser. Then I organized and analyzed the data. Using the information, I

developed a model that captures transportation and land use in C++. The model is capable of showing

greenhouse gas emissions in XXX from cars and public transportation systems. Being able to model emissions, I showed my professor different possibilities to decrease air pollution so that we can contribute to a better environment.

3) You do not need to tell your life story in your PS. everything in your PS should contribute to one of the 5 elements.

If you completely changed the course of your career, then you need to be especially careful of this. If your past experience is something you completely left behind, is definitely not something that you want to do in your future, and has not contributed to your development or your decisions for your future...then only mention it very briefly...because it is irrelevant. The only reason it should be in there is to show how you came to the decision to apply to school and that you did not just have a break in your career with no explanation.

PS 到底怎么写 4 - negative experiences

Just wanted to start by saying....

1) I am very busy, however, I spend about 30 minutes a day posting these blogs to help.

2) I offer individual essay and PS writing and edits, and I provide a guarantee where I will work with you UNTIL you are HAPPY with the document - unlimited revisions. This is to help you guys feel more

comfortable about choosing to work with me.

3) I will try my best to address all inquiries and offer consultations for INTERESTED customers as soon as possible.

Okay so moving into the topic for today. A lot of you guys have had negative experiences or failures at work or in school. This may cause you guys to want to explain the situation. Some schools even specifically ask for you to describe a failure....so how do we address this.

In a previous post I wrote...NEVER WRITE ANYTHING NEGATIVE. I still stand by this statement. But more

总结高人的PS经验

importantly...DO NOT DRAW ATTENTION TO YOUR FLAWS.

1) Bad experience with a company

So, for example...let’s say you had a very bad experience. It was not your fault. But for some reason you left the company. You want to explain the situation. Especially if there is a gap in your employment period, you

definitely should address the situation.

The conventional way to address the situation: My boss was unreasonable in his requests, causing me to leave the company.

The company did not understand the full situation, leading me to pursue a different career objective.

I was bored by my job. It was so routine.

DON'T DO THIS.

Why

By wording the situation this way, you are saying...it was not my fault. It was their fault. They were terrible. You were basically pointing a finger and trying to attribute all the problems to them and how they didn't

understand you. This will make ad-com members feel that you are disrespectful, ungrateful, difficult to work with, conceited, irresponsible and immature. The reason is...right away the ad-com member will think...it takes 2 parties to have a bad relationship. One person alone cannot do this...so regardless...you are at fault. By

pointing this out...you are also emphasizing your own flaws.

Instead try to word it as...

While working for xxx, I realized that my dreams and goals were pushing me in XXX direction. Therefore, after a conversation with my manager, we decided that it would be best for me to devote myself toward my goals in pursuit of the future that I really want. - This is just a spontaneous example I made up.

2) Sometimes you notice negatives about the company that you want to address. I actually received this as an email question from a CDer so I will just post it...

Q) What if I mentioned in my essay one of the serious defeat of the Big Four's advisory services -- Their work is too streamlined and their staffs know little about client's industry.(I was a summer intern there) And this point is actually quite important to support my career goal: open an consulting firm and provide professional service of superior quality.

A) Instead of saying...While working for XXX company, I realized that their advisory services were XXX and their work is too streamlined and their staff members are ignorant...

you can say

from my experience in industry, I have noticed several areas that have potential for improvement. For example, if staff members and customer service had a better understanding of the real-world business demands of

different industries, they would be able to address client concerns more effectively. Likewise, if business

operations were less streamlined (i'm not a business major so I don't really understand what you mean by

streamlined), the businesses could potentially attract a wider customer base....

To support your goal you can say...

I feel that my creativity, innovation and ability to see potential positive changes in corporate operations will help me realize my goal of founding a management consulting company.....

总结高人的PS经验

Do you see how by saying it this way...

1) you are not pointing fingers at any specific company, showing that you have courtesy and respect.

2) you are not saying anything negative

3) you are emphasizing your observation skills, creativity...and the positive possibilities.

4) you are not emphasizing the positive by making someone else look negative...this is very important. You

are simply talking about what could be changed and what the impacts would be.

5) lots of professors do consulting...what if the ad-com member reading your essay is a consultant for that

company? ...they would not like you very much.

3) Failures - just because the essay question asks you about a failure do not mean you go into detail about how you failed. You do not need to give a step by step account of what happened. Give a quick and brief summary in the beginning. Then focus the rest of the essay on what you learned from the experience, how you have overcome it, how it has made you a smarter, stronger, better person...and possibly provide another example showing how you have learned from the mistake. Always end the essay with the positive...because then, when the ad-com member finishes your essay, hopefully what sticks out in his/her mind is how you are able to learn from your mistakes...and that you are a stronger and better person.

Okay...as always... if you have any questions and are interested in finding out more about what I can provide in terms of services...you can email me at tinaxue@mit.edu. I will address the inquiries and I can offer a

consultation and comments for INTERESTED customers....if you just have a quick question about writing, please post below and I will address it. If you have a general big question...send me a message via CD and I will address it in the next blog.

essay考察的素质大同小异，包括：领导力、学习力、创新能力、团队合作能力、社会责任感和对自己的认识。

1．领导力

影响力，让周围的人和资源按照自己的愿望配置的能力。这种影响力往往和职位没有关系。（多读这方面的书籍和例文，写的新颖有深度）

2．学习力

对新事物的理解和把握。会学习。

3．创新能力

一种精神，一种领导变革的思维方式。

4．团队合作能力

显示出集体的优势，体现如何取长补短，让自己在组织中发挥最大作用的能力

5．社会责任感

不仅仅用做义工表达，通过小事说明

6．对自己的认识