大学英语泛读第三版《Shame》中英文双译.docx

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Shame羞耻

Whofelt ashamed?And ashamedof what? Why did the narrator write about his calf love for the little

girl?What ’ s the relationship between love and shame?Having understood these, you will have got

the key to this story.（48）

I never learned hate at home, or shame. I had to go to school for that. I was about seven years old

when I got my first big lesson.I was in love with a little girl named Helene Tucker, a light-complexioned little girl with pigtails and nice

manners. She was always clean and

she was smart in school. I think I

went to school then mostly to look

at her. I brushed my hair and even

got mea little old handkerchief.It was a lady ’s handkerchief, but I

didn ’t want Helene to see me wipe

my nose on my hand. The pipes were frozen again, there was no water in

the house, but I washed my socks and shirt every night. I’ d get a pot, and go over to Mister Ben ’s grocery store, and stick my pot down into his soda machine. Scoop out somechopped ice. By evening the ice melted to

water for washing. I got stick a lot that winter because the fire would

go out at night before the clothes

were dry. In the morning I’d put them on, wet or dry, because they were the only clothes I had.

Everybody ’s got a Helene Tucker, a symbol of everything you want. I loved her for her goodness,

her cleanness, her popularity. She’ d walk down my street and my

brothers and sisters would yell,

谁感到羞愧？什么使他羞愧？为什

么作者要描写他对这个小女孩青涩的暗

恋？爱与自卑之间到底有什么联系？理

解了这些，你将找到这个故事的

主题。（ 48 ）

我在家从未有过憎恶感、羞耻感，

而自从去了学校，我就有了这样的感

受。记得大约 7 岁那年，我得到了一次

深刻的教训。那时，我喜欢上一个叫海琳·塔克的小女孩，她肤色白皙，扎着马

尾辫，举止也很优雅。她在校总是衣着整洁，成绩优异。我觉得我去学校主要是为

了看她。我会梳理好自己的头发并带上一

块旧的小手帕。尽管这手帕是一个妇人的，可我却不想让海琳看到我用手擦鼻涕的样子。天很冷，水管再次冰冻，尽管家里没

有水，但我仍会在每天晚上清洗我的袜子

和衬衣。我会拿上一个罐子去本先生的食

品杂货店，将它放在苏打水冷藏柜下面，然后掏出一些冰块放在里面。到了晚上，我就可以用那些冰块化成的水来洗衣服。那年冬天我常常生病，因为在夜晚炉火会在衣服烘干之前熄灭。到第二天早晨，不管那衣服是湿还是干，我都会穿上，因为那是我唯一的衣服。

每个人的心中都有一个海琳·塔克，她就是你所想的一切优点的代表。我喜欢她，因为她善良、整洁、人缘好。如果她走在我回家的路上，我的兄弟姐妹就会大声叫道“海琳来了” ，然后我会将网球鞋的鞋面在裤脚上擦几下，希

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“ Here comes Helene,” and I ’d rub望我的头发不那么凌乱，普通的白色衬my tennis sneakers on the back of my衫更加服帖。接着就冲到路上，如果我pants and wish my hair wasn’t so知趣的话，便不会走得太近，这时她就nappy and the white folks’ shirt会向我眨眼并问好。那是一种很不错的

fit me better. I’d run out on the感觉。有时候，我会一直跟在她后面走，street.If I knew my place and铲去路上的积雪，并试图和她的妈妈、didn ’t come too close, she’ d wink阿姨做朋友。晚上，我会在从小旅馆擦at me and say hello.That was a good鞋回来的路上将钱放在她家的门阶上。feeling. Sometimes I’ d follow her她有个爸爸，工作不错，是个糊墙纸工。all the way home, and shovel the snow（47）

off her walk and try to make friends

with her Momma and her aunts. I’d

drop my money on her stoop late at

night on my way back from shining

shoes in the taverns. And she had a

Daddy, and he had a good job.He was

a paper hanger.

（ 47）

I guess I would have gotten over我猜想到夏天我便会把海琳忘却，Helene by summertime, but something但是 22 年以来，在那间教室发生的事happened in that classroom that made 情，使她的面孔在我脑海里挥之不去。her face hang in front of me for the我为了她，在高中参加击鼓活动，在大next twenty-two years. WhenI played学打破了某项记录。甚至当我站在台上the drums in high school it was for的麦克风边上听到掌声时，我也是希望Helene and when I broke track她能够听到这些的。一直到22 岁，我records in college it was for Helene结婚了，工作赚钱了，她才终于从我的and when I started standing behind生命中淡去，不再影响我。当我为自己microphones and heard applause I感到羞愧时，海琳就坐在那间教室里。wished Helene could hear it, too. It

wasn ’t until I was twenty-nine

years old and married and making

money that I finally got her out of

my system. Helene was sitting in

that classroom when I learned to be

ashamed of myself.

It was on a Thursday. I was那个周四，我坐在教室的后面的位sitting in the back of the room, in子上，座位周围被人用粉笔画了个圈，a seat with a chalk circle drawn代表这儿坐着的是个白痴，是个麻烦制around it. The idiot’s seat, the造者。

trouble-maker’s seat.

The teacher thought I was老师认为我是个笨蛋。我不会拼stupid. Couldn’ t spell, couldn’t写，不会朗读，不会算术。我就是个笨read, couldn’t do arithmetic.Just蛋！老师从来不会花心思去注意到你stupid.Teachers were never因为没有吃早饭因为肚子很饿而没有

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interested in finding out that you集中注意力。你所能想到的也就是中could n ’ t concentrate because you午，中午还能不能到得了呢？也许你可were so hungry, because you hadn’t以溜进衣帽间，偷一些孩子们大衣口袋had any breakfast.All you could里的午饭来吃。一点儿吃的，比如浆糊。think about was noontime, would it你不可能真的拿浆糊当饭，或者将它们ever come? Maybe you could sneak涂在面包上当三明治；但是有时候，我into the cloakroom and steal a bite还是会从教室后面的浆缸里舀几匙浆

of some kid ’s lunch out of a coat糊。怀孕的人口味很怪，而我却是满怀pocket. A bite of something. Paste.贫困，满怀污垢和令人掩鼻的臭味，满You can ’t really make a meal of怀凄凉和寒冷。我从来没穿过专为我买paste, or put it on bread for a的鞋子，我的床上还挤着另外 5 个人，sandwich, but sometimes I ’ d scoop可是隔壁房间里没有爸爸。并且饥饿一

a few spoonfuls out of the paste jar直与我同在。当我非常饿的时候，浆糊

in the back of the room. Pregnant吃起来也就不那么难以下咽了。

people get strange tastes.I was（43）

pregnant with poverty.Pregnant

with dirt and pregnant with smells

that madepeople turn away, pregnant

with cold and pregnant with shoes

that were never bought for me,

pregnant with five other people in

my bed and no Daddy in the next room,

and pregnant with hunger.Paste

doesn ’t taste too bad when you are

hungry.（ 43）

The teacher thought I was a老师认为我是一个麻烦制造者。她troublemaker. All she saw from the总是在教室前面看见一个黑人小男孩愚front of the room was a little black蠢地坐在座位上，东张西望制造噪音影boy who squirmed in his idiot’s响其他孩子，却看不见这个孩子之所以seat and made noises and poked the弄出声音是想引起老师的注意。

kids around him. I guess she could

not see a kid who madenoises because

he wanted someone to know he was

there.

It was on a Thursday, The day那一天是周四，黑人发薪日的前一before the Negro payday. The eagle天。福利金通常是在周五发放。老师要always flew on Friday. The teacher求每一位学生问他们的父亲可以为社区was asking each student how much his福利基金捐多少钱。在周五晚上，每位father would give to the Community孩子都会从他们父亲那儿拿到钱，并在Chest. On Friday night, each kid周一将钱带到学校。我决定我要给自己would get the moneyfrom his father,买一个爸爸。我口袋里的钱是靠擦皮鞋、and on Monday he would bring it to卖报纸挣来的。并且无论海琳?塔克从the school.I decided I was going to她爸爸那儿拿多少钱，我都要超越它。buy me a Daddy right then.I had我现在手里有钱，直到周一才会以

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money in my pocket from shining爸爸的名义拿出来。

shoes and selling papers,and

whatever Helene Tucker pledged for

her Daddy I was going to top it.And

I ’d hand the money right in.I

wasn't going to wait until Mondayto

buy me a Daddy.

I was shaking, scared to death.我有点发抖，紧张得要死。老师打The teacher opened her book and开她的书，开始按字母顺序叫名字。started calling out names

alphabetically.

“Helene Tucker ？”

“My daddy said he’d give two dollars and fifty cents .”

“ That's very nice,Helene. Very, very nice indeed.”

That made me feel pretty good.

I wouldn't take too muchto top that. I

had almost three dollars in dimes and quarters in my pocket. I stuck

my hand in my pocket and held onto

the money, waiting for her to call

my name. But the teacher closed her

book after she called everybody else in

the class.

I stood up and raised my hand.

“What is it now？”

“You forget me. ”（49）

She turned toward the blackboard. "I don't have time to be playing with you, Richard."

"My daddy said he'd..."

"Sit down, Richard, you're disturbing the class."

"My daddy said he'd give...fifteen dollars."

She turned around and looked mad. "We are collecting this money

for you and your kind, Richard Gregory. If your daddy can give fifteen dollars you have no business being on relief."

"I got it right now, I got it

“海琳 ?塔克？”“我爸爸说他

会给两美元五十美

分。

“那太好了。海琳，非常，非常好。”

这让我感觉非常好。我不会花太多钱去超越它。我口袋里有好多一角硬币和二十五分硬币，差不多三美元。我把手放进口袋里，牢牢地抓住钱，等待她叫我的名字。但是老师喊了教室每一个人的名字后合上了书。

我站起来，举起我的手。

“现在是怎么回事？”

“你忘了我。”（49）

她转过身面朝着黑板：“我没有时间陪你玩，理查德。”

“我爸爸说他可以 ,, ” “坐下，

理查德，你在扰乱课堂秩

序。”

“我爸爸说他可以捐 ,, 捐十五

美元。”

她转过来，看起来十分生气：“我们是在为你还有和你一样的人募捐，理查德·格雷戈里。如果你的爸爸能捐出十五美元，那你还需要什么政府扶助

金？”

“我现在就带它着呢，我现在带着

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right now, my Daddy gave it to me to turn in today, my daddy said,"

"And furthermore,"she said, looking right at me, her nostrils

getting big and her lips getting thin and her eyes opening wide, "We

know you don't have a daddy."

Helene Tucker turned around, her eyes full of tears.She felt sorry for me. Then I couldn't see her too well because I was crying, too.

"Sit down, Richard."

And I always thought the teacher kind of liked me. She always picked

meto wash the blackboard on Friday, after school.That was a big thrill;

it made me feel important.If I didn't wash it,come Monday the school might not function right.

“ Where are you going, Richard? ”

I walked out of school that day, and for a long time I didn ’ t go back very often. There was shame there.

（53）

Now there was shame everywhere.

It seemed like the whole world had

been inside that classroom, everyone had heard what the teacher

had said,everyone had turned around

and felt sorry for me. There was shame in going to the Worthy Boys

Annual Christmas Dinner for you and your kind, because everybody knew

what a worthy boy was. Whycouldn’t they just call it the Boys Annual

Dinner, Why ’ d they have to give it

a name? There was shame in wearing

the brown and orange and white plaid mackinaw the welfare gave to there thousand boys. Why’ d it have to be the same for everybody so when you walked down the street the people

could see you were on relief? It was

呢，我爸爸把钱给我让我今天交的，他说,, ”

“还有，”她盯着我说，她的鼻孔

在扩张，嘴唇越抿越紧，眼睛也瞪得大大的。“我们都知道你没有爸爸。”

海琳·塔克转过头来，她的眼睛里噙满泪水。她为我感到难过。然后我就看不清她了，因为我也哭了。

“坐下，理查德。”

我一直以为老师是有点儿喜欢我的，她总是在星期五放学后让我擦洗黑板。那曾使我很激动，觉得自己很重要。如果我不擦洗黑板，也许下周一学校就不能正常上课了。

“你要去哪儿，理查德？”

那天我走出了学校，此后很长一段时间我都没怎么回去。因为那里曾让我

感到羞耻。（ 53 ）

现在我觉得羞愧的无地自容，教室就像我的整个世界，每个人都听到了老师的话，每个人都面带歉意的看向我。参加年度最值得的孩子的圣诞晚宴也让我觉得羞愧，因为所有人都知道这个“最值得的孩子”是什么。为什么他们不能直接叫年度儿童晚宴？为什么他们非要那么叫它？我为穿着福利院给三千个孩子的棕色，橙色和白色格子花彩格厚呢外衣而感到羞愧，为什么每个人穿的都一样以至于你一走在大街上，人们就知道你是靠着救济生活的人。那件外衣是件很好的暖和的衣服，它还带有一个风帽，当我妈妈在塞满垃圾的桶底找到它的时候，她打骂了我，并说，我是一个小人。我为每天晚上跑去本先生家要他的腐烂的桃子感到羞愧，我为向西蒙先生要一勺糖而羞耻，我为跑去救济车而感到自卑。我恨那辆车，装满

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a nice warm mackinaw and it had a hood,

and my Mommabeat meand called

me a little rat when she found out

I stuffed it in the bottom of a pail full of garbage way over on Cottage Street.There was a shame in running over to Mister Ben’s at the end of the day and asking for his rotten peaches, there was shame in asking

Mrs.Simmons for a spoonful of sugar, there was shame in running

out to meet the relief truck.I hated that truck,full of food for you and your kind. I ran into the house and

hid when it came. And then I started to sneak through alleys to take the

long way home so the people going

into White ’s Eat Shop wouldn’ t see me.Yeah, the whole heard the teacher that day, we all know you

don’ t have a Daddy.（48）了给你的食物和善意。当它再次来的时

候我跑到屋子里藏了起来，然后从小路

跑到远处，他们就不会在那家免费餐厅

看到我。是啊，那天整个世界都听到了

老师说了什么，我们都知道你没有爸

爸。（ 48 ）

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