生活大爆炸_第一季_1-3集_剧本中英文台词

第一季第1集

My father broke his clavicle. -Leonard: Is that why they sent you to boarding school? -Sheldon: No. That was a result of my work with lasers. -Leonard: New neighbor? -Sheldon: Evidently. -Leonard: Significant improvement over the old neighbor. -Sheldon: 200-pound transvestite with a skin condition? Yes, she is. -Penny: Oh, hi. -Leonard: hi. -Sheldon: hi. -Leonard: hi. -Penny: Hi? -Leonard: We don't mean to interrupt. We live across the hall. -Penny: Oh, that's nice. -Leonard: Oh, no, uh, we don't live together. I mean, we live together, but in separate, heterosexual bedrooms. -Penny: Oh. Okay, well, guess I'm your new neighbor. Penny. -Leonard: Leonard. Sheldon. -Penny: hi. -Sheldon: hi. -Penny: hi. -Leonard: hi. -Leonard: Well, uh... oh, uh, welcome to the building. -Penny: Oh, thank you. Maybe we can have coffee sometime. -Leonard: Oh, great. -Penny: great. -Sheldon: great. -Leonard: great. -Leonard: Well, uh, Bye. -Penny: Bye. -Sheldon: Bye. -Leonard: Bye. Should we have invited her for lunch? -Sheldon: No. We're going to start Season 2 of Battlestar Galactica. -Leonard: We already watched the season 2 DVDs. -Sheldon: Not with commentary. -Leonard: I think we should be good neighbors and invite her over, make her feel welcome. -Sheldon: We never invited Louie/Louise over. -Leonard: Well... and that was wrong of us. We need to widen our circle. -Sheldon: I have a very wide circle. I have 212 friends on "myspace". -Leonard: Yes, and you've never met one of them. -Sheldon: That's the beauty of it. -Leonard: I'm going to invite her o

ver. We'll have a nice meal and... chat. -Sheldon: Chat? We don't chat. At least not offline. -Leonard: Well, it's not difficult. You just listen to what she says and then you say something appropriate in response. -Sheldon: To what end? -Leonard: Hi. Again. -Penny: Hi. -Sheldon: Hi. -Leonard: Hi. Anyway, um... we brought home Indian food. I know that moving can be stressful, and, and, I find that when I'm undergoing stress, that good food and company can have a comforting effect. Also, curry is a natural laxative and I don't have to tell you, that, you know, a clean colon is just one less thing to worry about.

我爸把锁骨都摔断了。 所以他们才送你去上了寄宿学校？ 不是，是我研究激光之后才送我去的。 新邻居? 显然是的。 显然比我们老邻居强很多。 一个重 200 磅有皮肤病的变装癖? 是的，没错。 噢，嗨。 嗨。 嗨。 嗨。 嗨？ 我们没想打扰你，我们住对门。 噢，真好。 我们不是睡一起。 我是说，我们住在一起，但是睡在两个单独的异性恋房间 里。 噢，好的，看来我是新邻居了。Penny。 Leonard Sheldon。 嗨! 嗨! 嗨! 嗨! 那个 欢迎搬到楼里来。 噢，谢谢，或许有时间我们可以一起喝咖啡。 噢，太好了。 好极了。 好极了。 好极了。 恩，那好，拜。 拜。 拜。 拜。 我们邀请她吃午餐怎样? 不行，我们要看第二季。 我们已经看过第二季的 DVD 了。 没看过转播的。 我觉得我们应该做好邻居，请她过来，让她觉得自在些。 我们就从没请 Louis/Louise 来过。 那是我们不对。我们要扩大朋友圈。 我的圈子很大了。在 MySpace 上我有 212 个朋友。 是啊，而且你一个都没见过。 这才是美好所在。 我要去请她过来。 我们会吃一顿美餐，好好聊一会儿。 聊天? 我们不聊天啊，至少下线时不会。 又不是很难，你只要听她说的话，然后你说些得体的话， 给她些回应就行了。 谈什么内容啊？ 嗨，又是我们。 嗨。 嗨。 就是那个，我们买了印度的食物回来 我知道搬家给人很大压力，我发现如果我有压力的时候。 美食和好友相伴可以产生安慰的效果。 同时咖喱还是天然泻药，我不用告诉你， 清空大肠是最不需要担心的。

-Sheldon: Leonard, I'm no expert here, but I believe in the context of a luncheon invitation, you might want to skip the reference to bowel movements. -Penny: Oh, you're inviting me over to eat? -Leonard: Uh... yes. -Penny: Oh, that's so nice. I'd love to. -Leonard: Great. -Penny: So, what do you guys do for fun around here? -Sheldon: Well, today we tried masturbating for money. -Leonard: Okay, well, make yourself at home. -Penny: Okay. Thank you. -Leonard: You're very welcome. -Penny: This looks like some serious stuff. Leonard, did you do this? -Sheldon: Actually, that's my work. -Penny: Wow. -Sheldon: Yeah. Well, it's just some

quantum mechanics, with a little string theory doodling around the edges. That part there, that's just a joke. It's a spoof of the Born-Oppenheimer approximation. -Penny: So you're like one of those beautiful mind genius guys. -Sheldon: Yeah. -Penny: This is really impressive. -Leonard: I have a board. If you like boards, this is my board. -Penny: Holy smokes! -Sheldon: If by "holy smokes" you mean a derivative restatement of the kind of stuff you can find scribbled on the wall of any men's room at MIT, sure. -Leonard: What? -Sheldon: Come on. Who hasn't seen this differential below "here I sit, broken-hearted"? -Leonard: At least I didn't have to invent 26 dimensions just to make the math come out. -Sheldon: I didn't invent them. They're there. -Leonard: In what universe? -Sheldon: In all of them. That is the point. -Penny: Uh... do you guys mind if I start? -Sheldon: Um... Penny...that's where I sit. -Penny: So, sit next to me. -Sheldon: No... I sit there. -Penny: What's the difference? -Sheldon: What's the difference?! -Leonard: Here we go. -Sheldon: In the winter, that seat is close enough to the radiator to remain warm, and yet not so close as to cause perspiration; in the summer, it's directly in the path of a cross-breeze created by opening windows there, and there. It faces the television at an angle that is neither direct, thus discouraging conversation, nor so far wide as to create a parallax distortion. I could go on, but I think I've made my point. -Penny: Do you want me to move? -Sheldon: Well... -Leonard: Just sit somewhere else. -Sheldon: Fine. -Leonard: Sheldon, sit! -Sheldon: Ah. -Leonard: Well, this is nice. We don't have a lot of company over. -Sheldon: That's not true.Koothrappali and Wolowitz come over all the time. -Leonard: Yes, I know, but... -Sheldon: Tuesday night we played Klingon Boggle till 1:00 in the morning. -Leonard: Yeah, I remember. -Sheldon: I resentyou saying we don't have company. -Leonard: I'm sorry.

瞧，虽然这方面我不是专家，但我相信这不是请人吃饭的 谈话内容 你或许该跳过对于清肠的提示。 噢，你是请我过去吃饭吗？ 是. 真好，我很愿意。 好极了。 那你们平时都玩些什么？ 今天我们刚试过靠自慰赚钱。 请随便些。 谢谢。 不用客气。 这看着像是很严肃的东西，是你们谁做的吗？ 事实上那是我的作品。 哇哦。 是的，只是一些量子力学。边上还乱画了一些弦理论。 这个部分，只是个笑话。 是讽刺波恩-奥本海默近似值的。 那你就像是“美丽心灵”里那种天才喽？ 是。 真是令人印象深刻。 我也有个板子，你要是喜欢板子，这块是我的。 我的天啊。 她说“我的天啊” ,她是说这些毫无独创性的理论重述在 麻省任何一个房间的墙上都能看到。 什么? 拜托。 这微分谁没见过啊？我真是心碎。 至少我不用创造 26 个次元，就为了做个算术。 不是创造，是本

来就存在的。 在什么范围啊 在所有的范围内。就是这样。 你们介意我开始吃吗？ 那是我坐的地方。 你可以坐我旁边。 不，我就是坐那儿的。 有什么不同吗？ 有什么不同? 又来了。 冬天的时候，这个地方离电暖器最近，很暖和，也不会很 热到直流汗。 夏天的时候，这里又刚好可以吹过堂风，是来自这扇窗户 和那扇的。 而且坐这里看电视的角度， 可以直接看， 又不会影响谈话， 不会太远，不至于造成脖子过分扭曲。 我可以继续，我想我已经说明白了。 你想我换个地方吗？ 恩 坐别的地方不行吗？ 好吧。 Sheldon,坐下。 恩。 这样真好。我们没怎么请人来过。 是的，Koothrappali 和 Wolowitz 总来。 是，我知道。 周二晚我们玩 Klingon 拼字游戏直到凌晨一点。 是啊，我记得。 那你干吗这么说？ 对不起。

-Sheldon: That has negative social implications. -Leonard: I said I'm sorry! -Penny: So... Klingon Boggle? -Leonard: Yeah. It's like regular boggle, but... in Klingon That's probably enough about us. So, tell us about you. -Penny: Um... me? Okay. I'm a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know. -Sheldon: Yes. It tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality. -Penny: Participate in the what? -Leonard: I think what Sheldon's trying to say is that Sagittarius wouldn't have been our first guess. -Penny: Oh, yeah. A lot of people think I'm a water sign. Okay, let's see, what else. Oh, I'm a vegetarian. Except for fish. And the occasional steak. I love steak! -Sheldon: Well, that's interesting. Leonard can't process corn. -Leonard: Well, uh, do you have some sort of a job? -Penny: Oh, yeah. I'm a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory. -Leonard: Oh... I love cheesecake. -Sheldon: You're lactose intolerant. -Leonard: I don't eat it. I just think it's a good idea. -Penny: Oh. Anyways, I'm also writing a screenplay. It's about this sensitive girl who comes to L.A. from Lincoln, Nebraska, to be an actress and winds up a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory. -Leonard: So, it's based on your life. -Penny: No, I'm from Omaha. -Leonard: Well, if that was movie, I would go see it. -Penny: I know, right? Okay, let's see, what else... um... Guess that's about it. That's the story of Penny. -Leonard: Well, it sounds wonderful. -Penny: It was. Until I fell in love with a jerk! -Sheldon: What's happening? -Leonard: I don't know. -Penny: God, you know, four years I lived with him. Four years that's like as long as high school! -Sheldon: It took you four years to get through high school? -Penny: It just... I can't believe I trusted him! -Leonard: Should I say something? I feel like I should say something. -Sheldon: You? No, you'll only make it worse. -Penny: You want t

o know the most pathetic part? Even though I hate his lying, cheating guts... I still love him. Is that crazy? -Sheldon: Yes. -Leonard: No, it's not crazy. It's uh... uh... it's a paradox. The paradoxes are part of nature. Think about light. If you look at Huygens, light is a wave, as confirmed by the double-slit experiment, but then along comes Albert Einstein and discovers that light behaves like particles, too. Well, I didn't make it worse. -Penny: I'm so sorry. I'm such a mess. On top of everything else, I'm all gross from moving and my stupid shower doesn't even work. -Leonard: Our shower works. -Penny: Really? Would it be totally weird if I used it? -Leonard: Yes. -Sheldon: No. -Leonard: No? -Sheldon: No.

这有负面的社会效应。 我道歉了。 那么 Klingon 拼字? 跟普通的没什么区别，就是在 Klingong 而已。 我们已经说的够多了，跟我们说说你吧。 我? 好的。 我是射手座的。这样你们就能了解很多想知道的事了。 是啊，这让我们知道你被大众文化所迷惑了 根据太阳的位置随便胡乱定个星座以及你的出生日期影 响了你的性格。 跟什么有关? 我想 Sheldon 是想说我们一开始没想到是射手座的。 是啊，很多人都觉得我像水相星座。 噢，我想想，还有什么？ 我吃素，除了鱼以外。 偶尔还有牛排，我爱死牛排了。 真有意思,Leonard 不能消化玉米。 你有在工作吗？ 我是 Cheesecake Factory 的女招待。 我喜欢芝士蛋糕。 你对乳糖过敏的。 我不吃，但我觉得这是个好主意。 还有，我还在写一部剧本。 是讲一个多愁善感的女孩子从林肯去了洛杉矶， 想要当女明星，却去当 Cheesecake Factory 的女招待。 是以你的生活为范本。 不，我是从奥马哈来的。 如果要拍成电影，我肯定去看。 我知道，没错。我想想，还有什么。 我想就是这样了。这就是 Penny 的故事了。 听起来很不错。 以前是的。直到我爱上了一个混蛋！ 怎么啦? 我不知道。 我和他一起住了 4 年。 4 年，那可跟高中时间一样长啊。 你用了 4 年才念完高中？ 我不敢相信我竟然那么信任他！ 我该说点什么吗？我觉得我该说两句。 你？你只会让事情更糟。 你知道最悲哀的是什么吗？ 虽然我恨他骗我，恨他对我不忠。 我还是爱他。我是不是疯了？? 没错。 不，这不是疯狂。是....只是有点矛盾。这是人的天性来 的。 想想光，如果你看惠更斯的东西光是一种波，已经被双狭 缝实验所证实了， 但之后，随着 Albert Einstein 的研究发现光也是有分子 运动的。 我没让事情变糟。 噢。真抱歉，我这么乱七八糟的。 而且搬家搬得我想吐，我的洗澡间还不能用。 我们的可以。 是吗? 那借我用下会不会很奇怪? 是的 不会! 不会? 不会

-Leonard: No. It's right down the hall. -Penny: Thanks. You guy

s are really sweet. -Sheldon: Well, this is an interesting development. -Leonard: How so? -Sheldon: It has been some time since we've had a woman take her clothes off in our apartment. -Leonard: That's not true. Remember at thanksgiving my grandmother with Alzheimer's had that episode? -Sheldon: Point taken. It has been some time since we've had a woman take her clothes off, after which we didn't want to rip our eyes out. -Leonard: The worst part was watching her carve that turkey. -Sheldon: So what exactly are you trying to accomplish here? -Leonard: Excuse me? -Sheldon: That woman in there is not going to have sex with you. -Leonard: Well, I'm not trying to have sex with her. -Sheldon: Oh, good. Then you won't be disappointed. -Leonard: What makes you think she wouldn't have sex with me? I'm a male and she's a female. -Sheldon: Yes, but not of the same species. -Leonard: I'm not going to engage in hypothetical here. I'm just trying to be a good neighbor. -Sheldon: Oh, of course. -Leonard: That's not to say that if a carnal relationship were to develop that I wouldn't participate. However briefly. -Sheldon: Do you think this possibility will be helped or hindered when she discovers your Luke Skywalker no-more-tears shampoo? -Leonard: It's Darth Vader shampoo. Luke Skywalker's the conditioner. -Howard: Wait till you see this. -Rajesh: It's fantastic, unbelievable. -Leonard: See what? -Howard: It's a Stephen Hawking lecture from MIT in 1974. -Leonard: This isn't a good time. -Howard: It's before he became a creepy computer voice. -Leonard: That's great. You guys have to go. -Rajesh: Why? -Leonard: It's just not a good time. -Sheldon: Leonard has a lady over. -Howard: Yeah, right - your grandmother back in town? -Leonard: No. And she's not a lady. She's just a new neighbor. -Howard: Hang on, there really is a lady here? -Leonard: Uh-huh. -Howard: And you want us out because you're anticipating coitus? -Leonard: I'm not anticipating coitus. -Howard: So she's available for coitus? -Leonard: Can we please just stop saying "coitus"? -Sheldon: Technically, that would be "coitus interrupts". -Penny: Hey, is there a trick to getting it to switch from tub to shower...? Oh, hi. Sorry. Hello~ -Howard:Enchanté! Mademoiselle. Howard Wolowitz, Cal Tech, Department of Applied Physics. You may be familiar with some of my work. It's currently orbiting Jupiter's largest moon taking high-resolution digital photographs. -Penny: Penny. I work at the cheesecake factory. -Leonard: Come on, I'll show you the trick with the shower. -Howard: Bonne douche. -Penny: I'm... I'm sorry?

不会。就在走廊尽头。 谢谢了，你们人真好。 这可真是有趣的发展。 那怎样？ 有段时间没有女人在我们公寓里把衣服脱光了。 不是的，记得那年感恩节吗，我奶奶得了老年痴呆也上演 了这一幕啊。 说的是有段时间没有女人在我们公寓里把衣服脱光了 而我们不想把自己眼珠子挖出来。 最糟的是看

着她在那儿切火鸡。 你这么做到底是为了什么呢？ 你说什么？ 那个女人是不会和你上床的。 我也没想要和她上床啊。 噢，很好，那你就不会失望了。 你凭什么觉得她不会跟我上床呢？ 我是个男人，她是个女人。 话是没错，但不是同一个物种。 我不是再搞什么异想天开。 我只是想当个好邻居。 噢，当然了。 但不是说如果有可能发展肉体关系我也不一定不会参与。 大致是这样。 你觉得有没可能阻止她当她发现用的是卢克.天行者无泪 配方洗发水？ 是 Dark Vador 的洗发水。 卢克.天行者的护发素。 必须得看看这个。 绝对精彩，难以置信。 看什么啊？ 是 1974 年 Steven Hawking 在麻省理工的讲座。 现在不合适。 在他成为计算机声音之前。 很好，你们得离开这儿。 为什么? 现在就是不合适嘛。 Leonard 请了一位女士过来。 是啊，你外婆又回来了啊？ 不，她不是位女士，只是新邻居。 等一下，真的有位女士在吗？ 是。 你赶我们出去是因为你想有性行为? 我没有。 那就是她可以发生性行为? 可以不要再说这个词了吗? 应该是中断性行为。 嘿，有没哪个开关可以从水龙头变成喷头的? 噢，嗨，抱歉。各位好。 你好，小姐。 Howard Wolowitz 加州科技大学应用物理系。 你可能很熟悉我的一些作品。 现在正沿着木星轨道拍摄高清晰数字照片。 Penny 我在 Cheesecake Factory 工作。 来，我告诉你开关在哪儿。 好好享受洗澡。 你说什么？

-Howard: It's French for "good shower". It's a sentiment I can express in six languages. -Leonard: Save it for your blog, Howard. -Howard:洗个痛快澡! -Leonard: All right, there it goes. It sticks. I'm sorry. -Penny: Okay, thanks. -Leonard: You' welcome. Oh, you're just going to step right... Okay, I'll... -Penny: Hey, Leonard... -Leonard: The hair products are Sheldon's. -Penny: Okay. Um, can I ask you a favor? -Leonard: A favor? Sure, you can ask me a favor. I would do you a favor for you. -Penny: It's okay if you say no. -Leonard: Oh, I'll probably say yes. -Penny: It's just not the kind of thing you ask a guy you just met. -Leonard: Wow. -Sheldon: I really think we should examine the chain of causality here. -Leonard: Must we? -Sheldon: Event A: a beautiful woman stands naked in our shower. Event B: we drive halfway across town to retrieve a television set from the aforementioned woman's ex-boyfriend. Query: on what plane of existence is there even a semi-rational link between these events? -Leonard: She asked me to do her a favor, Sheldon. -Sheldon: Ah, yes. Well, that may be the proximal cause of our journey, but we both know it only exists in contradistinction to the higher level distal cause. -Leonard: Which is? -Sheldon: You think with your penis. -Leonard: That's a biological impossibility. And you didn't have to come. -Sheldon: Oh, righ

t, yes, I could have stayed behind and watch Wolowitz try to hit on Penny in Russian, Arabic and Farsi. Why can't she get her own TV? -Leonard: Come on, you know how it is with break-ups. -Sheldon: No, I don't... and neither do you. -Leonard: I... I broke up with Joyce Kim. -Sheldon: You did not break up with Joyce Kim. She defected to North Korea. -Leonard: To mend her broken heart. This situation is much less complicated. There's some kind of dispute between Penny and her ex-boyfriend as to who gets custody of the TV. She just wanted to avoid having a scene with him. -Sheldon: So we get to have a scene with him? -Leonard: No, Sheldon, there's not going to be a scene. There's two of us and one of him. -Sheldon: Leonard, the two of us can't even carry a TV. -Penny: So, you guys work with Leonard and Sheldon at the university? Um, I'm sorry. Do you speak english? -Howard: Oh, he speaks English. He just can't speak to women. -Penny: Really? Why? -Howard: He's kind of a nerd. Juice box? -Leonard: I'll do the talking. -Man: Yeah? -Leonard: Uh, hi, I'm Leonard, this is Sheldon. -Sheldon: Hello. -Leonard: Let's... Uh, we're here to pick up Penny's TV. -Man: Get lost. -Sheldon: Okay, thanks for you time.

是法语里“好好享受洗澡”的意思。 只是我本人会讲六种语言。 留着写博客吧，Howard。 洗个痛快澡! 好了，可以了，有点卡住了。抱歉。 好的，谢谢。 不客气。你可以转 好，我走了。 Leonard.。 那些洗发用品都是 Sheldon 的。 好的。能请你帮个忙吗？ 帮忙？ 当然可以请我帮忙，我愿意帮你的忙。 你不答应也没关系的。 我很可能会答应。 只是一般不会对刚认识的人提出这种要求。 哇。 我真的觉得我们该好好想想这里面的因果关系了。? 有必要嘛？ 事件一我们那淋浴器下站着个裸体美女。 事件二我们开车穿过半个城市到上述那位女性的前男友 处取回一台电视机。 提问： 在哪个层面上这两个事件哪怕是有关半点合理的联 系？ 她请求我帮她个忙，Sheldon。 是啊，这可能是我们这趟旅途最近似的原因了， 但其只存在于更高层次原因的对比之下，这点我们都清 楚。 是什么？ 你在用下半身思考。 从生理上说这是不可能的。还有你可以不用跟来啊。 不错，我可以留在那儿看着 Wolowitz 用俄语，阿拉伯语， 波斯语来勾引 Penny。 我不明白她怎么不能自己拿电视？ 你也知道分手是怎样的。 不，我不知道 你也不知道。 我以前和 Joyce Kim 分过手。 你没有和 Joyce Kim 分手，是她投奔回朝鲜了。 去缝补她破碎的心啊。 现在这情况远没那么复杂。 就谁该得到这台电视机的拥有权，Penny 和她前男友有过 争吵。 她只是不想和他再大吵大闹。 所以就得让我们去见他？ 不会有争吵的。 我们两个，他一个人。 Leonard 我们俩连电视机都抱不动。

那么，你们是 Leonard 和 Sheldon 大学的同学喽? 抱歉，你讲英文吗？ 噢，他讲英文的，就是不擅长和异性讲话。 真的吗为什么? 他有点古怪。喝果汁？ 我来谈。 怎么？ 嗨,我是 Leonard,他是 Sheldon。 你好。 让我们 我们是来拿 Penny 的电视的。 滚蛋! 耽误你时间了。

-Leonard: We're not going to give up just like that. -Sheldon: Leonard, the TV's in the building. We have been denied access to the building, ergo, we are done. -Leonard: Excuse me. If I were to give up on the first little hitch I never would have been able to identify the fingerprints of string theory in the aftermath of the big bang. -Sheldon: My apologies. What's your plan? It's just a privilege to watch your mind at work. -Leonard: Come on, we have a combined IQ of 360. We should be able to figure out how to get into a stupid building. -Sheldon: What do you think their combined IQ is? -Leonard: Just grab the door! This is it. I'll do the talking. -Sheldon: Good thinking. I'll just be the muscle. -Man: Yeah? -Leonard: I'm Leonard, this is Sheldon. -Sheldon: From the Intercom. -Man: How the hell did you get in the building? -Leonard: Uh... we're scientists. -Sheldon: Tell him about our IQ. Leonard... -Leonard: What? -Sheldon: My mom bought me those pants. -Leonard: I'm sorry. -Sheldon: You're going to have to call her. -Leonard: Sheldon, I am so sorry I dragged you through this. -Sheldon: It's okay. It wasn't my first pantsing and it won't be my last. -Leonard: And you were right about my motives. I was hoping to establish a relationship with Penny that might have someday led to sex. -Sheldon: Well, you got me out of my pants. -Leonard: Anyway, I've learned my lesson. She's out of my league. I'm done with her. Got my work, one day I'll win the Nobel Prize and then I'll die alone. -Sheldon: Don't think like that. You're not going to die alone. -Leonard: Thank you, Sheldon. You're a good friend. -Sheldon: And you're certainly not going to win a Nobel Prize. -Howard: This is one of my favorite places to kick back after a quest. They have a great house ale. -Penny: Wow, a cool tiger. -Howard: Yeah, I've had him since Level 10. His name is Buttons. Anyway, if you had your own game character we could hang out, maybe go on a quest. -Penny: Um... sounds interesting. -Howard: So you'll think about it? -Penny: Oh, I don't think I'll be able to stop thinking about it. -Rajesh: Smooth. -Leonard: We're home. -Penny: Oh, my god, what happened? -Leonard: Well, your ex-boyfriend sends his regards and I think the rest is fairly self-explanatory. -Penny: I'm so sorry. I really thought if you guys went instead of me he wouldn't be such an ass. -Leonard: No, it was a valid hypothesis. -Sheldon: That was a valid hypoth... What is happening to you? -Penny: Really... thank you so much for going and trying. Oh, you're so terrific. Really. Why don't you get some clothes on??I'll get my purse,

我们不能就这么算了。

可是电视在大楼里。 我们已经被阻止进入大楼了，因此，我们没戏了。 你说什么? 如果一有困难我就放弃，我就永远不可能分辨出。 大爆炸后期弦论的“指纹” 。 我道歉。你打算怎么做？ 看到你动脑子，真是荣幸。 拜托，我们两个智商加一起都 360 了。 我们得想办法怎么进去这栋破楼里! 你觉得她俩之智商加一起... 快挡住门。就是这儿。我来谈。 好啊，我就当出力的那个。 什么事？ 我是 Leonard,他是 Sheldon。 就对话机里那个. 你们是怎么进来的? 我们是科学家。 告诉他我们智商有多高。Leonard 怎么? 那裤子是我妈给我买的。 对不起。 你负责打给她。 Sheldon,我很抱歉，害你牵扯进来。 没什么，这不是我的第一条裤子，也不会是最后一条。 关于我的动机，你说的对。 我是希望能和 Penny 之间有点什么 或许哪天能和她做 爱。 可你却让我把裤子脱了。 总之我吸取教训了。 她和我不是一国的，我不再奢求什么。 我要继续自己的生活，等到哪天得到诺贝尔奖，然后孤独 地死去。 别那么说，你不会孤独地死去的。 谢谢，Sheldon。你是个好朋友。 你当然也肯定不会得诺贝尔奖的。 这是我最喜欢的地方之一，被追到后进行反击。 他们的麦酒很不错。 喔，好酷的老虎。 是的，我打到第 10 级有了它。 它叫 Boutons。 如果你有自己的游戏角色，我们可以一起玩，互相追逐。 听起来很有意思。 那你会考虑吗？ 噢，我想我会不停地考虑下去的。 顺利。 我们回来了。 噢，天啊，发生什么事了？ 你前男友对我们表示欢迎。我想剩下的部分你也猜到了。 太对不起了。 我真的以为如果你们替我去，他就不会那么混蛋了。 不，难免会这么想的。 这合理...? 你是怎么了啊 很感谢你们去那里想要帮我。 你们人真的是太好了。真的。 你们何不穿好衣服，我去拿包，晚饭我请你们。

第一季第2集

-Leonard:

So you kind of act like a carbohydrate delivery system. Call it whatever you want, I get my minimum wage.

也就是说，你类似于是，碳水化合物的运送系统。 是啊，随便你怎么叫它，我能拿到基本工资。 好吧，不管怎么说，我在想你能不能帮

我个忙 没问题。 太好了。明天我有些家具要运过来，我可能不在家，所以 ... 你...你们好 抱歉 没人用俄语夸奖过你的绝世美貌吗 不，没有。 你得习惯这个。 呃，我可能很难习惯。 嘿 Sheldon 。 嗨 嘿 Raj。还是不理我，嗯 别放在心上。这是他的病状，他没法和女人说话。 没法和迷人的女人说话，而你是芝士蛋糕香气逼人的女神。 那么，有家具要搬过来 对。如果明天送来时我不在，你能帮我签收一下吗 然后搬进我的房间 没问题。 太好了，这是我的备用钥匙，谢谢！ Penny,等等。 怎么 呃... 如果你没别的计划， 要不来和我们一起吃泰国菜，还有超人电影马拉松 马拉松 哇噢，你们那儿有多少部超人电影 你开玩笑，对吧 我超喜欢那部，路易丝·莱恩从直升机上坠下。 超人嗖地一下过去接住她。 那是哪一部 就一部。 你知道那场景里，充斥着科学错误吧？ 是啊，我知道，人类不能飞。 不，不，让我们假设人类可以。 路易丝·莱恩以 32 英尺/秒平方的初始加速度急速坠落， 超人突然下降，用钢铁般的手臂接住她。 莱恩小姐此时大约速度在 120 英里/时， 猛撞上超人的手臂后，她会马上被切成三等分。 除非超人赶上她的速度并减速。 哪还有时间，先生 哪有时间 她离地面只有两英尺。 坦白讲，如果他真的爱她，就应该让她直接撞地。 那会是种更仁慈的死法。 抱歉，你全部的争论，都只是建立在一个假设上， 假设超人的飞行能力，是一种力量的特技。 你知道自己说什么吗 这一点是毋庸置疑的啊。 这是他跳跃高楼能力的延伸， 是他从太阳光中获取的能力。 你没发现问题吗 那他在夜里怎么飞行 哦，结合月球的日光反射， 以及氪星人皮肤细胞中贮存的能量。 我要回去洗个手先。

-Penny:Yeah. -Leonard:

Yeah. Um, anyways, I was wondering if you could help me out with something. I've kinda had... Yes. great. I'm having some furniture delivered tomorrow and I may not be here, so...

-Penny:Okay, -Howard: -Howard:

Oh. H Hello. I'm sorry Haven't you ever been told how beautiful you are in flawless Russian I haven't.

-Penny:No,

Get used to it. I probably won't.

-Penny:Yeah.

Hey,Sheldon. Hi Hey, Raj. Still not talking to me, huh

-Sheldon: -Howard: -Leonard:

Don't take it personally, it's his pathology. He can't talk to women.

He can’t talk to attractive women or in your case, a cheesecake scented goddess. So there's going to be some furniture delivered yeah. If it gets here and I'm not here tomorrow, could you just sign for it,

-Penny:Yeah, -Leonard:

and have them put it in my apartment No problem. Here's my spare key. Thank you.

-Penny:Great.Penny, wait.

-Penny:Yeah -Leonard: -Penny:A -Sheldon: -Penny:IUh...If you don't have any other plans

,

do you want to join us for Thai food and a Superman movie marathon marathon Wow. How many Superman movies are there You're kidding, right do like the one where Lois Lane falls from the helicopter

and Superman swooshes down and catches her. Which one was that One(其他人齐声说)

-Sheldon: -Sheldon:

You realize that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy. I know, men can't fly.

-Penny:Yes,

No, no. Let's assume that they can.

Lois Lane is falling, accelerating at an initial of 32 feet per second. Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel. Miss Lane, who is now traveling at approximately 120 miles an hour, hits them and is immediately slice into three equal pieces.

-Leonard: -Sheldon:

Unless Superman matches her speed and decelerates. In what space, sir In what space

She's two feet above the ground. Frankly, if he really loved her, he'd let her hit the pavement. It'd be a more merciful death.

-Leonard: -Sheldon:

Excuse me, your entire argument is predicated on the assumption

that Superman's flight is a feat of strength. Are you listening to yourself

It is well established that Superman's flight is a feat of strength. It is an extension of his ability to leap tall buildings. an ability he derives from exposure to Earth's yellow sun.

-Howard:And -Sheldon:

you don't have a problem with that How does he fly at night

Oh, a combination of the moon's solar reflection

and the energy-storage capacity of Kryptonian skin cells.

-Penny:I'm

just gonna go wash up.

-Leonard: -Sheldon: -Raj:Also, -Leonard:

I have 2,600 comic books in there.

我那儿有 2600 本连环画册。 你敢不敢去找出，所谓的"氪星人皮肤细胞"的内容 接受挑战。我们被锁在外面了。 还有，漂亮女孩也走了。 房间在四楼，可是电梯坏了， 所以你们得... 你们就这么走了 好吧，没事，谢谢。 我们自己搬上去吧。 我不这么想。 为什么不 呃，我们没有手推车， 没有升降运送带，也没有那么强悍的上肢力量。 我们不需要靠蛮力，我们是物理学家。 我们是阿基米德的精英后代。 给我一个杠杆，一个支点，我就能撬动地球。 可问题是...我没有。 我没有! 我没有!! 阿基米德会为你骄傲的。 你有办法吗 有，但都需要绿灯侠和能量指环 (美国漫画超级英雄)。 慢点...慢点 很好，现在我们弄成了斜面。 运上去所需的力度，按梯角的正弦值减少， 30 度角的话，就减少一半力气。 正好一半。 正好一半。 来推吧。 看，推动了，很容易。 一切都是数学原理。 遇到转角，你用什么公式 什么 好吧呃... 没问题，你上来这儿帮我拉，然后转弯。 啊，地心引力，你真是无良的婊子。 你得明白，我们这儿所有的努力， 绝不可能增加你和那女人，发生性关系的几率。 男人为女人做事，并不是只求做爱予以回报。 那是对于，刚做

过爱的男人来说。 我这么做，是想成为一个好邻居。 无论如何，这也绝不会降低几率啊。 快到了。快到了。快到了。 不，还没到。不，还没到。 对不起。 小心你的手指。 好的。 上帝啊我的手指! 你没事吧 不，她... 伟大凯撒的亡灵啊，看看这地方。 看来 Penny 的房间有一点凌乱。 有一点凌乱 高次幂 Mandelbrot 集的复杂数字，才叫有一点凌乱。 这简直是一团糟。

I challenge you to find a single reference to Kryptonian skin cells. Challenge accepted. We're locked out. the pretty girl left. Ok, her apartment's on the fourth floor but the elevator's broken,

so you're gonna have to... Oh, you're just gonna be done Okay. Cool. Thanks. I guess we'll just bring it up ourselves.

-Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard:

I hardly think so. Why not Well, we don't have a dolly,

or lifting belts or any measurable upper-body strength. We don't need strength-- we're physicists.

We are the intellectual descendants of Archimedes. Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the Earth. It's just a matter of... I don't have this. I don't have this! I do not have this!!

-Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard:

Archimedes would be so proud. Do you have any ideas Yes, but they all involve a green lantern and a power ring. Easy... easy.

Okay. Now we've got an inclined plane. The force required to lift is reduced by the sine of the angle of the stairs, call it 30 degrees, so, about half.

-Sheldon: -Leonard:Let's push..

Exactly half. Exactly half.

Okay. See, it's moving, this is easy. It's all in the math.

-Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

What's your formula for the corner What Okay, uh...

Okay, yeah, no problem. Just come up here, help me and turn. Ah, gravity, thou are a heartless bitch.

You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of you having sexual congress with this woman.

-Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

Men do things for women without expecting sex. Those would be men who just had sex. I'm doing this to be a good neighbor.

In any case, there's no way it could lower the odds. Almost there. Almost there. Almost there. No, we're not. We’re not. I'm sorry. Watch your fingers. Watch your fingers. Yeah. Oh, God, my fingers! You okay No, her... Great Caesar's ghost, look at this place. So Penny's a little messy. A little messy

The Mandelbrot set of complex numbers is a little messy. This is chaos.

Excuse me. Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid.

不好意思。 你解释下，一个餐具盘放在沙发上，这样的组织系统能叫合理 吗

Now, I'm just inferring that this is a couch because the evidence s the coffee table is having a tiny garage sale.

现在，我只是假设这是沙发， 因为证据显示，咖啡桌上正进行一场小型旧货出售

。 你有没想过，并不是每个人都觉得必须要... 归类、整理、 并将一切事物都贴上标签 没有想过。 其实人们不这样，也许你很难相信， 大多数人并不用纤维量，去归类他们的芥麦早餐。 抱歉，但我认为我们都发现，有时那个很管用。 快点，我们得走了。 等一下。 你在干嘛 我在清理。 Sheldon,这不是你的家。 这根本不能叫家，这是社会恶化的旋涡中心。 当易装癖住在这儿的时候，你就不计较他怎么糟蹋这的。 因为他的很完美。当你打开那男人的衣橱时，从左到右，依次 是女士晚礼服、 女士短裙、然后是警察制服。 你去翻他的衣橱干什么 我帮他调试摄像头网线。 嘿，伙计们。 嘿，Penny。 家具刚到，我们搬上来...刚刚。 太好了，你们搬上楼来很费劲吧 不。 "不" 不。 不。 好了，我们出去了。 太好了，再次谢谢你们。 Penny,我只是想让你知道，你没必要这样生活。 有我在呢。

-Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

Did it ever occur to you that not everyone has the compulsive need to sort, organize

and label the entire world around them No. Well, they don't. Hard as it may be for you to believe,

most people don't sort their breakfast cereal numerically by fiber content. Excuse me, but I think we've both found that helpful at times. Come on, we should go. Hang on. What are you doing I'm straightening up. Sheldon, this is not your home. No, this is not anyone's home. This is a swirling vortex of entropy. When the transvestite lived here, you didn't care how he kept the place. Because it was immaculate. I mean, you opened that man's closet, it was left to right

evening gowns, cocktail dresses, then his police uniforms.

-Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard:

What were you doing in his closet I helped him run some cable for a web cam. guys.

-Penny:Hey,

Oh, Hey, Penny.

This just arrived, we just brought this up... just now.

-Penny:Great. -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:No. "No" No. No.

Was it hard getting it up the stairs

Well, we'll get out of your here. great. Thank you again.

-Penny:Okay,

Penny...I just want you to know that you don't have to live like this.

I'm here for you.

-Penny:What's -Leonard: -Penny:I -Leonard: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

he talking about

他在说什么 说笑话。 我没听懂。 是啊，他讲不来笑话的。 Sheldon! Sheldon 哈罗 Sheldon! 嘘，嘘，Penny 在睡觉。 你疯了吗 你不能就这么闯进一间女人的公寓，深更半夜，还打扫整理。 我别无选择。 我没法睡着，明明知道，我卧室外是客厅，客厅外是走廊，而 直接紧接走廊的是...这个。 你有没想过，万一 Penny 醒了， 该如何解释我们在这儿呢。 我刚就给了你一个合理解释。 不，不

,你给了我一个解释。 可它的合理性，得由你的同伴陪审团来裁决。

It's a joke. don't get it. Yeah, he didn't tell it right. Sheldon Sheldon!Hello Sheldon! Shh, Shh, shh. Penny's sleeping. Are you insane

You can't just break into a woman's apartment in the middle of the night and clean. I had no choice.

I couldn't sleep knowing that just outside my bedroom was our living room, and immediately adjacent to the hallway was... this.

-Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard:

Do you realize that if Penny wakes up,

there is no reasonable explanation as to why we're here. I just gave you a reasonable explanation. No, no, you gave me an explanation.

Its reasonableness will be determined by a jury of your peers.

-Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

Don't be ridiculous. I have no peers. Sheldon, we have to get out of here. You might want to speak in a lower register. What Evolution has made women sensitive to high-pitched noises while they sleep

别说笑了。我没什么同伴。 Sheldon,我们得出去。 也许你得降低声调。 什么 人类进化使得女性在睡觉时，对高声调的噪音特别敏感， 这样她们就能被哭闹的婴儿唤醒。 如果你不想吵醒她，降低声调。 太可笑了! 不，太可笑了。 好吧，我接受你的假设，拜托，我们走。 没清理完，我不会走的。 如果你如此清闲，还不如帮着清理。 噢，该死的。 早上好。 早上好。 我得说我睡得非常好。 老实说，睡得不久，但是很深很沉。 我不觉得惊讶。 一个有名的民间治愈失眠法，就是闯入邻居的房间打扫清理。 讽刺我吗 你说呢 老实说，我的方法也许有些极端， 但我认为最终有效地，增进了 Penny 的生活质量。 你说得对，也许今晚我们该再偷溜去，给她的地毯来个泡泡浴。 你不觉得那样太过火了吗 当然。 Sheldon,难道要我每次开口讽刺你时，都举块讽刺牌 你有讽刺牌 不，我没有讽刺牌。 你想来些芥麦吗 今天感觉真好，我决定选择，架子尾端的低纤维食物。 哈罗，蜂蜜泡芙。 狗娘养的! Penny 起床了。 你们这些恶心变态的杂种! 她怎么知道是我们 我也许在她卧室的衣橱，留下了一个暗示性的组织记号。 Leonard! 上帝啊，糟糕了。 再见，蜂蜜泡芙。哈罗，大糠芥麦。 你们昨晚趁我睡着时，进了我的房间! 是的，但只是帮你清理房间。 顶多也就是整理。本质上讲，你并不脏。 把钥匙还给我。 我非常抱歉。 你们知道这有多么可怕吗 是的，我们昨晚详细地讨论过了。 我的房间，趁我睡着时! 还打鼾，那也许是种鼻窦传染病。 但那会引发睡眠时呼吸暂停，你最好去看耳鼻喉科医师。 就是看咽喉的医生。

so that they'll be roused by a crying baby. If you want to avoid waking her, speak in a lower register.

-Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leon

ard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

That's ridiculous! No. That's ridiculous. Fine. I accept your premise. Now, please, let's go. I'm not leaving until I'm done.

If you have time to lean, you have time to clean. Oh, what the hell. Morning. Morning. I have to say I slept splendidly.

Granted, not long, but just deeply and well. I'm not surprised.

A well-known folk cure for insomnia is to break in your neighbor's apartment and clean. Sarcasm You think Granted, my methods may have been somewhat unorthodox,

but I think the end result will be a measurable enhancement to Penny's quality of life. You've convinced me. Maybe tonight we should sneak in and shampoo her carpet. You don't think that crosses a line Yes.

For God's sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth You have a sarcasm sign No, I do not have a sarcasm sign. Do you want some cereal

I feel so good today; I'm going to choose from the low-fiber end of the shelf. Hello, Honey Puffs.

-Penny:Son -Leonard: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon: -Leonard: -Penny:Do -Leonard: -Penny:In -Sheldon: -Penny:You

of a bitch!

Penny's up. sick geeky bastards!

How did she know it was us I may have left a suggested organizational schematic for her bedroom closet.

-Penny:Leonard!God, this is going to be bad. Good-bye, Honey Puffs. Hello, Big Bran. came into my apartment last night while I was sleeping!

-Penny:You

Yes, but only to clean. Really more to organize. You're not actually dirty, per se. me back my key.

-Penny:Give

I'm very, very sorry. you understand how creepy this is Oh, yes, we discussed it at length last night. my apartment, while I was sleeping! And snoring. And that's probably just a sinus infection.

But it could be sleep apnea. You might want to see an otolaryngologist. The throat doctor.

-Penny:And -Sheldon: -Leonard:

what kind of doctor removes shoes from asses

哪种医生能从屁股里提鞋 依深度来看，那可能是直肠病医生，或是普通外科医生。 讽刺(纸上写的) 上帝! Penny,你现在的想法完全正确，也许再过一会儿， 当你感到不是那么... 该怎么说，被冒犯时， 我们可以再谈谈这件事。 离我远点。 当然，那也是种方法。 Penny,Penny! 等等。 澄清一下，因为你离开后，这儿会展开讨论。 你是只反对我们，趁你睡着时偷溜进你房间， 还是也反对被强迫接受一个，全新而井井有条的模范房间 呃，这个回答太含糊了。 你得马上大步走去，正式向她道歉。 有什么好笑的

Depending on the depth, that's either a... proctologist or a general surgeon. SARCASM

-Penny:God! -Leonard: Penny, I think what you're feeling is perfectly valid and maybe a little bit later todaywhen you're feeling a little less... for lack of a better word-- violated, maybe we can

talk about this some more.

-Penny:Stay -Leonard: -Sheldon:

away from me.

Sure, that's another way to go. Penny, Penny! Hold on.

Just to clarify, because there will be a discussion when you leave. Is your objection solely to our presence in the apartment while you were sleeping, or do you also object to the imposition of a new organizational paradigm. Well, that was a little non-responsive.

-Leonard:What's funny

You are going to march yourself over there right now and apologize.

-Sheldon: -Leonard: -Sheldon:

That wasn't sarcasm No. Whoo, boy, you are all over the place this morning.

那不是讽刺吗 不是。 哇，小子，今早什么话都是你说了算啊。 我有一个硕士学位，两个博士学位，我不应该这么做。 什么事! 对于昨晚发生的事，我真挚地向你道歉。 我负全部责任。 而且我希望不会影响到，你对 Leonard 的看法。 他不仅仅是个好人，而且我听说，他是个温和细心的好情人。 我尽力了。 嗨，Raj。 嘿，听着。 我不知道你是否听说了，昨晚 Leonard 和 Sheldon 干的事， 但我是真的很生气。 我是说，他们... 居然闯进我的房间打扫。 你能相信吗 那多么奇怪。 她离我非常近。 哦，她闻起来真香。 什么味道，香草 知道吗，在我家乡，如果有人这样做，你直接毙了他，明白吗 不仅仅是射伤他。 我是说，好吧，我姐姐把她丈夫开枪打死了，但只是意外，他 们喝醉了。

I have a master's and two Ph.D.s, I should not have to do this.

-Penny:What! -Sheldon:I am truly sorry for what happened last night.

I take full responsibility. And I hope that it won't color your opinion of Leonard, who is not only a wonderful guy, but also, I hear, a gentle and thorough lover. I did what I could.

-Penny:Hey,Hey, listen.

Raj.

I don't know if you heard about what happened last night with Leonard and Sheldon, but I'm really upset about it. I mean, they just... they let themselves into my place and then they cleaned it. Can you even believe that How weird is that

-Raj:she's

standing very close to me.

Oh, my, she does smell good. What is that, vanilla

-Penny:You

know, where I come from, if someone comes into your house at night, you shoot. Okay

And you don't shoot to wound. I mean, all right, my sister shot her husband, but it was an accident, they were drunk.

Wait, what was I saying

等等，我刚说什么 她的话真多。 也许爸妈说得对。 也许我最好和一个印度女孩远走高飞。 我们有相同的文化背景， 我妻子可以给孩子们唱同样的摇篮曲，就像我妈妈对我唱的一 样。

-Raj:She's

so chatty.

Maybe my parents are right. Maybe I'd be better off with an Indian girl. We'd have the same cultural background and my wife could sing to my children the same lullabies my mother sang to me.

-Penny:It's -Penny:I'm

obvious that they meant well, but I'm just... having a really rough tim

e. Like I said, I broke up with my boyfriend and...

很明显他们是好意，但我只是... 我这段时间很难熬。就像我说的，我和男友分手了... 因为我生命中出现的大部分男人都是混蛋，

I mean, just because most of the men I've known in my life happen to be jerks,

doesn't mean I should just assume Leonard and Sheldon are. Right

但并不表明我能假定，Leonard 和 Sheldon 也是，对吗 她问我问题了，我应该点头。 我就是这么想的，谢谢你的倾听。 你真是个好人。

-Raj:She

asked me a question. I should probably nod. exactly what I thought. Thank you for listening.

-Penny:That'sYou're a doll.

-Raj:Uh-oh.

Turn your pelvis. a napkin, homie. You just got served.

哇哦，转动你的骨盘。 喔!拿张纸巾吧，哥们，尝到逊的滋味了吧。 好了，你赢了。 怎么回事 他假想的女友和他分手了。 又来了。 哈罗。 抱歉迟到了，我在走廊和 Penny 聊天。 真的 你 Rajesh Koothrappali 和 Penny 说话了 事实上，我更多的是倾听者，而非叙述者。 她说了些什么 她还生我气吗 呃，她开始很生气， 但可能因为她姐姐开枪射死过某人。 但然后提到了你们，再然后就抱了我。 她抱你 怎么抱你的 我闻到的是她的香水味吗 令人陶醉，不是吗 嗨。 怎么了

-Howard:Phew!Grab -Leonard:It's -Howard:What's -Sheldon:His -Howard:Been -Raj:Hello.

fine. You-You win. his problem

imaginary girlfriend broke up with him. there.

Sorry I'm late, but I was in the hallway, chatting up Penny.

-Howard:Really -Raj:Actually, -Leonard:What -Raj:Well,

You, Rajesh Koothrappali, spoke to Penny

I was less the chatter than the chat-ee. did she say Is she still mad at me

she was upset at first,

but probably because her sister shot somebody. But then there was something about you, and then she hugged me.

-Howard:She

hugged you How'd she hug you

Is that her perfume I smell

-Raj:Intoxicating -Penny:Hi.What's going on

,isn't it

-Leonard:Um...

Here’s the thing.

呃...是这样。 Penny,就像奥本海默站出来，为他发明第一枚原子弹而道歉， 我同样为我参与的一点判断失误感到抱歉。 人类伟大实验的标志在于，主动承认错误。 这些错误，例如居里夫人发现的镭，被发现具有巨大的科学研 究潜力，

Penny,just as Oppenheimer came regret to his contribution to the first atomic bomb, so too I regret my participation, at least error in judgment. The hallmark of the great human experiment is the willingness to recognize one's mistakes. Some mistakes,such as Madam Curie discovered radium,turned out to have great scientific potential,

even though she would later die a slow, death from radiation poisoning. Another example, from the field of Ebola research...

虽然她此后死于，慢性而痛苦的辐射中毒。 另一例子，在埃博拉病毒的研究领域 Leon

ard 嗯 我们没事了。 62 个木钉。 有。 一包飞利浦螺旋钉。 有。 伙计们，我在农场长大的，好不好？ 我大概，12 岁时，就重组了一台拖拉机发动机。 我想我能组装这样一个，便宜的瑞典货家庭影院。 不，让我们来。考虑到这是我们唯一能做的。 考虑到什么 这地方看起来多棒 伙计，我害怕这个。 什么

-Penny:Leonard -Leonard:Yeah -Penny:We're -Leonard:62 -Leonard:One -Penny:Youokay. wood dowels.

-Sheldon:Check.package Phillips head screws.

-Sheldon:checkguys, seriously, I grew up on a farm, okay

I rebuilt a tractor engine when I was, like, 12. I think I can put together a cheap, Swedish media center.

-Leonard:No, -Howard:Oh, -Raj:what? -Howard:These

please. We insist. It's the least we can do, considering. what How great this place look

-Sheldon:Considering

boy. I was afraid of this.

instructions are a pictographic representation of the least imaginative way to

这些说明书，尽是组装这些配件最没有想象力的方法。

assemble these components. This right, here is why Sweden has no space program. 这就是为什么，瑞典没有太空计划。 呃，在商店里看起来还不错。 这个设计效率很低。比方说，Penny 有一台纯平电视， 这意味着，后面的空间都浪费了。

-Penny:Well, -Leonard:It

it-it looked pretty good in the store. is an inefficient design. For example, Penny has a flat screen TV,

which means all the space behind it is wasted.

第一季第3集：The Fuzzy Boots Corollary

-Leonard:That's all right, my tail's prehensile- - I'll swat him off. -Raj:I got him, Leonard. Tonight I spice my mead with goblin blood. -Leonard:Raj, no, it's a trap! They're flanking us! -Raj:He's got me! -Leonard:Sheldon, he's got raj. Use your sleep spell! Sheldon Sheldon -Sheldon:I've got the sword of Asaroth! -Sheldon:There is no more Sheldon. I am the sword master! -Howard:Leonard, look out! -Leonard: it, man, we're dying here! -Sheldon:Good - bye, peasants! -Leonard:The bastard teleported! -Raj:He's selling the sword of Asaroth on ebay. -Leonard:You betr

ayed us for money Who are you -Sheldon:I'm a rogue night elf. Don't you people read character descriptions Wait, wait, wait! Somebody just clicked "buy it now. -Howard:Ooh, I’m the sword master. -Sheldon:Ooh, I'm all sweaty. Anybody want to log on to second life and go swimming I just built a virtual pool. -Leonard:No. I can't look at you or your avatar right now. -Howard:Sounds like your neighbor's home. -Leonard:Excuse me. -Sheldon:Don't forget the mail you took accidentally we on purpose, so you'd have an excuse to talk to her. -Leonard:Oh, right, right, right, right. -Howard:Stealing snail mail- - very old school. I like it. -Leonard:Penny, the mailman, did it again... he... oh, sorry. -Penny:Um, oh, hi, Leonard. This is Doug. Doug, this is my neighbor Leonard. -Doug:What's up, bro -Leonard:Not much... bro. -Penny:Is everything okay -Leonard:Yeah, no, I just... I got your mail again. Here. -Penny:Thank you. I've got to talk to that mailman. -Leonard:Oh, no, that's probably not such a good idea. You know, civil servants have a documented propensity to, you know, snap, so... -Penny:Okay. Well, thank you again. -Leonard: No problem. Bye. Oh, and bye... bro. -Sheldon: Penny for your thoughts. -Raj: What's the matter -Leonard:I'm fine. Penny's fine.

没事，我脑后长眼着呢，我会干掉他的。

我打中他了，Leonard。 今晚我要用那地精的血来祭酒。 Raj,不要，这是个陷阱! 他们在夹击我们! 我被打中了! Sheldon,他打中 Raj 了，快用你的催眠咒! Sheldon Sheldon 我拿到了艾辛诺斯之刃! 我不再是 Sheldon 了。 我是剑圣! Leonard,当心! 该死，我们快不行了! 再见了，土人们! 那混蛋走了! 他在 ebay 上出售那把艾辛诺斯之刃。 你为了钱背叛我们 你怎么这样 我是暗夜精灵盗贼，你们没有读过角色介绍吗

等等! 有人点击了"立即购买" 我是剑圣! 哦，我身上都是汗，谁想再进入《第二人生》游个泳

我刚建了个虚拟游泳池。 不，我现在不想看见你或是你的兽身。 好像是隔壁的声音。 失陪。 别忘了带上你"无意"拿到的信件，

这样你就有借口跟她说话了。 噢，对，对。 偷窃信箱邮件，很老套的方法，我喜欢。

Penny 邮差又... 哦，抱歉。

嗨，Leonard,这是 Doug。 Doug,这是我邻居 Leonard。 有事吗，老兄 没什么... 老兄。 一切还好吧 是啊，我只是... 我又错拿了你的信，给你。 谢谢，我得和邮差说说了。 不，这主意不怎么好。 人民公仆总是非常容易...动粗，

好吧，还是谢谢你。 没问题，再见。 哦再见...老兄。 呆呆地在想什么呢 (此谚语中正好有 Penny 一词) 怎么回事 我很好，Penny 也很好。

The guy she's kissing is really fine. -Howard : Kissing, what kind of kissing Cheeks Lips ? Chins?Friend? -Leonard:What is wrong with you -Howard:I'm a romantic. -Sheldon: Plea

se don't tell me that your hopeless infatuation is devolving into pointless jealousy. -Leonard:I'm not jealous. I'm just a little concerned for her. I didn't like the look of the guy that she was with. -Howard:Because he looks better than you -Leonard:Yeah. He was kind of dreamy. -Sheldon: Well, at least now you can retrieve the black box from the twisted, smothering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her and analyze the data so that you don't crash into geek mountain. -Howard:I didn’t agree, love is not a sprint; it's a marathon- a relentless pursuit that only ends when she falls into your arms... or hits you with the pepper spray. -Leonard:No, I'm done with penny. I'm going to be more realistic and go after someone my own speed. -Raj:Like who -Leonard:I don't know... Olivia Geiger. -Sheldon: The dietician at the cafeteria with the limp and the lazy eye -Leonard:Yeah. -Sheldon: Oh, I don't think you have a shot there. I have noticed that Leslie Winkle recently started shaving her legs. Now given that winter is coming, one can only assume she's signaling sexual availability. -Howard:I don't know. You guys work in the same lab. -Leonard:So? -Howard:There are pitfalls. Trust me, I know. When it comes to sexual harassment law, I'm a bit of a self-taught expert. -Leonard:Look, Howard, if I were to ask Leslie winkle out, it would just be for dinner. I'm not going to walk into the lab, ask her to strip naked and dance for me. -Howard:Oh, then you're probably okay. -Leonard:Hello, Leslie. - Leslie:Hi, Leonard. -Leonard:Leslie, I would like to propose an experiment... -Leslie:Goggles, Leonard. -Leonard : Right. Leslie, I would like propose an experiment.

和她接吻的家伙也很好。 接吻，哪一种 脸颊 嘴唇 下巴 (情人)朋友

你什么毛病啊 我是个浪漫主义者。 别告诉我你不可救药的迷恋，发展成了无意义的嫉妒。

我不是嫉妒，只是有点担心她。

我不怎么喜欢那家伙的长相。 因为他长得比你帅气 是啊，可以说是梦幻般的外形。 至少你现在还能从燃烧的废墟里，找回装满对她美妙幻想的黑 匣子，

好好分析下数据，你就不会再坠入"呆子谷"。

我反对，爱情不是短跑，而是马拉松。

永不放弃地追逐，直到她最终投入你的怀抱。

或是用防狼喷雾剂喷你。 不，我和 Penny 结束了。 我要更现实些，去追求合我拍的人。

比如谁 不知道... Olivia Geiger。 自助餐厅里那个有点跛，还有弱视的营养学家

是的。 哦，我看你没戏。 我注意到 Leslie Winkle 最近在刮她的腿毛。

既然冬天都已经到了， 只能说明她是在暗示，她可以作为做爱对象。 我不清楚，你们在同一个实验室。 所以呢 这有隐患，相信我，我清楚。 说到性骚扰的相关法律，我可是自学而成的专家。

Howard,如果我要约 Leslie Winkle 出去，也只是吃顿饭。

我不会去实验室，要她为我跳脱衣舞。

哦，那你就没事了。 嗨，Leslie。 嗨，Leonard。 Leslie,我建议做个实验... 戴上眼镜，Leonard。 好吧。Leslie,我建议做个实验。

-Leslie:Hang on. I'm trying to see how long it takes a 500 kilowatt oxygen iodine laser to heat up my cup noodles. -Leonard : I've done it. About two seconds. 2. 6 for minestrone. Anyway, I was thinking more of a bio- social exploration with a neuro-chemical overlay. -Leslie:Wait, are you asking me out -Leonard : I was going to characterize it as the modification paradigm. with the addition of a date like component, but we don't need to quibble over terminology. -Leslie:What sort of experiment would you propose -Leonard :There's a generally accepted pattern in this area. I would pick you up, take you to a restaurant. Then we would see a movie, probably a romantic comedy featuring the talents of Hugh Grant or Sandra Bullock. -Leslie:Interesting. And would you agree that the primary way we would evaluate either the success or failure of the date would be based on the biochemical reaction during the good night kiss -Leonard:Heart rate, pheromones, etc. Yes. -Leslie:Why don't we just stipulate that the date goes well and move to the key variable -Leonard:You mean kiss you now -Leslie:Yes. -Leonard:Can you define the parameters of the kiss -Leslie:Close mouthed but romantic. Mint -Leonard:Thank you. Shall I count down from three -Leslie:No, I think it needs to be spontaneous. What do you think -Leonard:You proposed the experiment. I think you should present your findings first. -Leslie:Fair enough. On the plus side, it was a good kiss. Reasonable technique, no extraneous spittle. On the other hand, no arousal. -Leonard:None -Leslie:None. -Leonard:Well, thank you for your time. -Leslie:Thank you. -Leonard:None at all -Howard:Sheldon, if you were a robot, and I knew and you didn't... would you want me to tell you - Sheldon:That depends. of our colleagueslashfriendship

等一下。 我想试试一个 500 千瓦氧碘激光器，

得花多久把我的杯装泡面加热。 我试过，大概 2 秒，蔬菜汤花 2.6 秒。

总之，我在考虑来个生物学的社交探索，结合神经化学方面的 专家知识。 等等，你约我出去 我认为是改变我们同事/友谊关系的范例，

外加个约会作为补充成分， 但我们不需要一直说术语。 你计划做怎样的实验 这个领域有种普遍接受的模式。

我去接你，带你去餐厅， 接着我们可以看场电影。 也许一部休·格兰特或桑德拉·布洛克天才演绎的浪漫轻喜剧。

有意思。 你是否同意，我们评价约会成败的依据是基于离别之吻时的化 学反应

心跳率、生化信息素等等，的确。 我们干嘛不假定约会很顺利，直接进行关键的有变数的部分

你意思是现在就吻你 是的。 你怎么定义吻的参数吗

嘴唇的亲密度还有浪漫度，要薄荷吗 谢谢。 我数三下 不，我觉得应该自然点。 感觉怎么样 你提出的实验方案，该由你先说说实验的发现。

很公平。 从正面讲，这个吻很不错。 合理的技术，没有多余的唾沫。 另一方面讲，没什么感觉。 没感觉 没有。 呃，很感谢你抽出时间。 谢谢你。 一点感觉都没 Sheldon,如果你是机器人，我知道但你自己不知道...

你希望我告诉你吗 看情况。

When I learn that I'm a robot... will I be able to handle it -Howard:Maybe- - although the history of science fiction is not on your side. - Sheldon:Okay, uh, let me ask you this- when I learn that I'm a robot, would I be bound by Asimov's three laws of robotics -Raj:You might be bound by them right now. -Howard:That's true. Have you ever harmed a human being or through inaction allowed a human being to come to harm - Sheldon:Of course not. -Howard:Have you ever harmed yourself or allowed yourself to be harmed except in cases where a human being would have been endangered - Sheldon:Well, no. -Howard:I smell robot. -Leonard:Hey, what's going on - Sheldon:Internet's been down for half an hour. -Raj:Also, Sheldon may be a robot. -Howard:So how'd it go with Leslie -Leonard:Oh, we tried kissing, but the earth didn't move. I mean, any more than the 383 miles that it was going to move anyway. - Sheldon:Oh, I've seen that look before. This is just going to be two weeks of moping and tedious emo songs. and calling me to come down to pet stores to look at cats. I don't know if I can take it. -Raj:You could power down.. -Howard:Well, as usual, Wolowitz has the solution. I happen to know a place where there are plenty of eligible women and Leonard could have his pick. -Dancer:Remember the Latin hips. Shoulders stay still, and... we sway. One, two, three... ...five, six, seven. -Howard:I think Mrs. Tishman's got her eye on you. I've been there. You're in for a treat. -Leonard:She said, "you don't know me" You "don't even care" oh, yeah... - Sheldon:Oh, good lord. -Leonard:She said, "you don't know me" you don't wear my chains Oh, yeah. God, that's a good song. - Sheldon : If you're compiling a mix CD for a double suicide. Oh, I hope that scratching post is for you. -Leonard: I know what you're thinking. I've taken your asthma into account. There's a feline geneticist in San Diego who's developed the cutest little hypoallergenic calicos.

当我得知我是机器人... 我有能力承受吗 也许吧，虽然历来的科幻小说都不能苟同这点。

好吧，我来问你。 当我得知我是机器人， 我要受限于阿西莫夫的"机器人三定律"吗 你可能现在就受限哦。 就是啊，你伤害过人类吗 或任人受伤而袖手旁观 当然没有。 除了在他人危险的情况下，你会伤害自己或容忍自己被伤害吗

呃，没有。 我闻到机器人的味道了 (以上问题

均出自"机器人三定律")。 嘿，过得怎么样 互联网瘫痪半个小时了。 还有 Sheldon 可能是机器人。 和 Leslie 怎么样啦 哦，我们试着接吻，但地球没转。 我是说，比地球原来转的 383 英里要更多。

哦，我以前看过他这表情。 未来两周他将一直闷闷不乐，哼唱乏味的情感歌曲，

要我下去宠物商店看猫。 我不知道撑不撑得住。 你可以关掉自己的电源。 一如既往，Wolowitz 会有解决办法的。 我碰巧知道个好地方，有很多符合条件的女士。

Leonard 可以任意选。 记住拉丁舞的技巧。 肩膀挺直，然后摇摆。 一二三... 五六七。 Tishman 女士一直盯着你呢。 我有过经验，你会喜欢的。 她说，你不了解我， 你甚至不在乎，哦，耶 哦，上帝。 她说，你不了解我， 你不戴我送你的项链。 哦，耶，天啊，这歌真棒。 当然，如果这是你为双重自杀混合录制的 CD。

我希望那"猫抓柱"是你自己用的。 我知道你在想什么，你的哮喘病我有考虑在内。

圣地亚哥有个研究猫科的遗传学家， 培育了一种超可爱的低变应原小猫。

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