The Differences between Western Friendship and Chinese Friendship

The Differences between Western Friendship and Chinese

Friendship

西方友谊与中国友谊的差异

Friendship

1. Brief Introduction……………...……………………………………………………1

2. Different Concepts of Friendship………………...…………………………………1

2.1 The friendship in the eyes of Chinese and American ……………………………1

2.2 The friendship in my eyes……………………………………...…………………2

2.3 The expectation from our friends…………………………………………………2

2.4 The things we can depend on our friends……………….…………………………2

3. The Methods of Building Friendships with People from Different Cultures………3

4. Conclusion………………..…………………………………………………………4

Friendship

1. Introduction

Research suggests that understanding of the concept of friendship varies as a result of age, gender, region, and cultural background. Intercultural friendships are characterized by differences between individuals’ cultures that bring unique cultural knowledge and broaden their perspectives. In some aspects, we should know the different cultures from different places in order to keep our friendship with other person for longer time.

2. Different Concepts of Friendship

2.1. The Friendship and Friends in the Eyes of Chinese and American

Here in China, friends do not merely remain a companion or a playmate sharing the same interest; they turn into sources of help and information providers from time to time. This is a perfect mirror of cultural difference in the perception of contributors to success. Help and information are the chiefs for success in an oriental society, while in the west people strongly emphasize personal efforts and the realization of personal value.

In China, although Chinese more gentle humility, but in their heart for the definition of friend and friendship is quite clear. It is a very serious for friends and friendship. Chinese people own the friendship with like-minded friends who share the similar interests, similar personalities, otherwise they can not be real friends and they can only be regarded as ordinary.

But friends and friendship in the eyes of Americans is quite different from the Chinese people. In the American dictionary, the definition of friends is very widely. In the OXFORD, friends are the person who you like, the supporter and so on. The people to meet by chance like patches of drifting duckweed can be friends. Thus, for

the friendship, the Americans more open to more casual compared with Chinese.

2.2. The Friendship in my Eyes

Firstly, friendship means not being alone. Life is no fun if no one could share with you. Secondly, friendship means having someone we can rely on. Thirdly, friendship means being committed to others. To be a friend is the best way to have a friend. A friend should be those we loved and those who loved us.

2.3. The Expectation from Our Friends

Chinese friends give each other more concrete help. A Chinese will use personal connections to help a friend get something hard to obtain. They give each other money and might help each other out financially over a long time.

In the West, you can certainly ask a friend to do something with you, but you recognize that your friend may say no, if he or she gives you as reason. You would not expect a friend to drop everything to respond to a non-urgent need such as shopping. Nor would you expect a friend to recognize and respond to your wishes without stating them.

A friend in China is someone who offers help without waiting to be asked. There are few limits to what you can expect from a friend. You can feel free to tell your friend what he or she can or should do or help or please you.

2.4. The Things We Can Depend on Our Friends

A Chinese friend will use personal connections to help a friend get something hard to obtain such as a job, an appointment with a good doctor, an easier path through an official procedure or an introduction to another person who might also be able to give concrete help. Chinese friends give each other money and might help each other out financially over a long period of time. This is rarely part of western friendships, because it creates dependence of one person on the other and it goes against the principle of equality.

In a western country, as with so many other things in the west, people prefer to

be independent rather than dependent, so they do not feel comfortable in a relationship in which one person is giving more and the other person is dependent on what is being given.

3. The Methods of Building Friendships with People from Different Cultures

1) The only to make friends with people of different nationality is to come out of your comfort zone, to only be friends with people that you feel comfortable with. Do not be afraid to reach out.

2) Express a genuine concern and care for the individuals and express a willingness to learn various things about their culture, such as any special greetings, their language, their traditions, religion, role of men and women in the family, education and foods, even tell them that you would love to try some of their foods. You will provide an atmosphere to make them feel welcome and open. However, do not ask too many questions all at the same time.

3) If you have difficulties understanding someone from a different culture or if they have problems understanding you, be patient with them. Say what you need to say slowly, repeat your message if you have to, until they fully understand what you are trying to communicate

4) Understand and expect there will be differences with certain issues and the way they do things, they will carry different opinions and perspective based on their culture. Embrace their differences and be at peace with them.

5) Call them. Invite them to dinner, events, and activities.

4. Conclusion

"Friendship" is a type of companionship, which a human towards another human being or an organism can have. It's a bond in which one has a feeling towards another one. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each

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